VRSS (Virtual Reality Simulation System) – Episode 2 (A Short Story)

We were walking down the busy high street of Chelmsford when I spotted the gaming pod in the window accompanied with the large sign advertising how awesome it was and that we can go and have a go ourselves. It’s one of those gaming shops where you can either rent a game or buy one, as well as having various consoles available for anyone to come and have a go. It’s done mainly so that people can have a quick play test of the latest games before they give in and pay big money for the games, sometimes even the consoles as well. Now that the new Virtual Reality Simulation System has hit the market, everyone has been wanting one, including me.

I’ve been visualising inside my head finally having the change to grab one of them and take them home, but the moment I saw the price I nearly fainted. I understand that shops and the company making the pods have to make a profit, but surely they would be able to lower the price by a small percentage at least. It seems that those who are fortunate enough to have all the money in the world are the only ones who can have one.

My friend has said that they will come down in price eventually, but eventually is relative, meaning the timeframe from the moment they are released to the moment the price drops to an acceptable level can be years, and by the time I’ve worked up enough money to finally get myself one, the new upgraded version would have hit the markets, practically making the current one we have to day obsolete. That’s just how technology works. Forever updating and never sitting still. No matter what you have, there will always be a newer version soon, and of course, once everyone has gotten wind of the newer version, they will flock to that one, and brag about how more awesome it is compared to the rubbish old version.

But I have all that to look forward to. Today, I can forget about the future and focus on the present as the advertisement in the shop window says that the shop has five pods, and from what I can see through the small gab between poster and window frame, only three of the pods are occupied, meaning I can snatch one up for myself.

Well, I would instantly if I could, but I’m with my mum at the moment, who has been dragging me round the shops to get every piece of school equipment imaginable for the next year. The Summer holidays are nearly over, which is a disappointing fact. A lot has happened over the last five weeks: Swimming with my friends, going on a bike ride with my dad, learning how to bake cakes with my mum. This holiday has been awesome from beginning to end, which has resulting in it going rather fast. There would be a better end to an awesome holiday if I were able to have a go in one of those pods.

My mum does want to get back so she can start sorting out some things. What those things are, I have no clue, but I’m sure I can persuade her to stay for a few more minutes. Yeah, once in the pod, the games time is unknown, meaning I could be in there for a rather long time, but that doesn’t matter as long as I’ve enjoyed myself. I’m sure we can come up with some sort of compromise even if my mum is in a massive hurry.

‘Mum,’ I grabbed her attention. We were the same height, so all she had to do was turn her head to look at me. I forgot to mention that she was carrying three bags in each hand, and I was carrying one bag in each. They were heavy, but they could have been a lot heavier if my mum had been tempted to buy that ridiculous lamp the shape of a monkey. She said it looked funny, but I thought it would look completely out of place if she had put it in the living room, on the table beside the settee. I’m so glad that I don’t have to look at that every day. Anyway, back to the question.

‘Can I have a go in one of those pods?’ I asked casually. As soon as I mentioned the pods, the poster immediately caught her attention and her facial expression went from curiosity at why I had asked that question, to sudden realisation. From her perspective, everything just made sense. Her expression changed once more, and it was one I knew instantly what she would say to follow it up with.

‘No.’

‘Why not?’ I pushed. A good explanation wouldn’t hurt instead of a frank no.

‘They’re too violent. I don’t like violent video games. They cause more problems than they’re worth.’ That was a little bit harsh, and dare I say not entirely true.

‘But I’ve got GTA at home,’ I said.

‘And rather reluctantly on my part, I will say,’ she said sternly. ‘Your dad got you that, and I did put my foot down, but we came to a compromise that an adult would be present at all times when you’re playing, and if you showed any signs of copying, we would take the game away immediately. Yeah, I know you didn’t know that,’ she said as I looked rather confused. To be honest, whenever I had wanted to play the game, either my mum and dad would sit on the settee beside me, but always nonchalantly, such as they would either be reading a book, using the laptop, doing a bit of knitting, or listening to music with their iPod, and on occasion when they had left the house and I wanted to play the game, I couldn’t find it. It does make sense now. I couldn’t believe how obvious their actions were until now. So obvious in fact that I was truly blinded by their true intentions. You know that moment when a massive puzzle piece suddenly pops into place and you wonder how you could have lived without it for so long? Yeah, that’s the moment I’m experiencing now. My mind has just been blown, and my mum knew it.

She thought it would be the end of the discussion, so continued onwards, passed the shop and down a small road where the car has been parked. As I slowly came back to my sense, I realised where we were and I pressed further, much to my mum’s annoyance, but she knew that I would try again at some point. That’s just how things work – the formula never changes.

‘But you will be present when I’m in the pod,’ I said. That cunning trick was never going to get passed my mum. She knew what I was trying to do.

‘It’s not the same. When you’re on the sofa, we knew exactly what you were doing. When you’re in the pod, you could be doing anything and we would have no clue, because all we will see is a pod, with you asleep. It’s not the same,’ she repeated for emphases.

‘But mum,’ I said a little too whiney for my and her liking, but I carried on regardless because I had to if I were to put my point across, ‘it’s just a game.’

‘And there has been numerous accounts stating that violent video games causes real life violence – people your age doing things they shouldn’t because they believe they can get away with it as they have been doing so for so long when playing that game,’ she explained thoroughly that I had a momentary feeling that I had truly lost, but my want to experience that pod helped me create a comeback that I thought was rather good to keep this debate going and edge me closer to making mum say yes.

‘There is no real evidence suggesting anything of the sort,’ I said, although I did feel as if that sentence needed something more. I figured out what that something was when mum retaliated with. “There’s no real scientific evidence suggesting anything of the sort”, was what I had meant to say, but there’s no point in trying to put that across. I had to move on and say something different to increase the value of my side of the debate.

‘All the newspapers that report on any crime that has been committed by someone of your age has stated clearly that they have been playing violent video games. They’ve used quotes such as, “who has played violent video games”, or, “who has frequently played violent video games”, or, “who liked playing a range of violent video games”. The newspapers would say that if there wasn’t a link between the crime and the games.’

‘Yes they would,’ I nodded. ‘They would most defiantly say that, especially if it meant increasing their word count for that particular article. If there is ever a chance that the papers could state something like that, they would without hesitation. Newspapers nowadays focus on scaring, not stating the facts. If they stated the facts, they wouldn’t sell hardly as many papers as they are doing now.’

‘That’s a very grown up and mature opinion you have there,’ mum said impressed as we entered the car park. Does that mean what I think it means? Probably not. ‘But…’ yep, knew that was coming, ‘just because you have a good opinion, doesn’t mean I have to agree with it. In fact, as you grow up, you may change that opinion to something completely different. ‘Of course,’ mum continued unexpectedly, ‘that is the whole point of growing up – to look at the world in a different way than how you looked at it as a child.’ Was she talking to me or herself? ‘but it’s best to experience things aimed at your age you are now not what you will, because that will make your viewpoint confusing, so the answer’s still no, by the way.’ She was talking to me.

‘Have I showed any signs of copying what I’ve seen on GTA?’ I asked mum as she pressed the button on her keys and popped the boot open. She then, with one hand through the handles of the carrier bags, grabbed the boot’s handle and lifted up. Once the boot was fully open, she placed all her bags in the back, and took my bags from me so that she could place them in the right place so they wouldn’t fall over on the journey home. Once happy with how the bags were arranged, she shut the boot and unlocked the car, after which she proceeded to walk around to the front and climb into the driver’s side. I walked around to the other side and climbed into the passenger’s side. Once inside, I pulled the seatbelt around me and clicked it into place. Mum mirrored my actions before starting the car, putting it in gear and started to back out of the parking space.

She eventually answered my question.

‘No, you haven’t. But we’ve made sure you wouldn’t, or will ever...’

‘Because you taught me the difference between fiction and fact. When I said that it’s only a game, I meant that the game was fiction, and when it comes to the newspapers suggesting that there’s a connection, they’re not saying that because there is a strong connection because there’s no scientific evidence to suggest anything of the sort.’ I finally said what I should have said before. Whether it would have an affect has yet to be seen. ‘Like I said, they are just saying that to make up the word count.’ Maybe I shouldn’t have said that because I’ve just repeated myself, therefore making that point a little weaker than it could have been. ‘The game is fiction, therefore not real, therefore all my actions that I do are not real. I know that. And so do many people. If they didn’t, they we would be seeing crime waves all over the place.’

‘That’s enough, Lucas,’ mum said sternly. I may have crossed the line there. ‘I don’t think you understand enough to know everything about what you’ve just said, which is why my answer is no, and will remain that way.’

‘Eventually I will be able to do whatever I want,’ I said a little sulkily.

‘Eventually, yes, you will reach the age when I will have no power over you except through advice that you are not obligated to take, but when you’re still impressionable and younger than that age, then you will accept my answer and say no more about it, otherwise I will take GTA away from you permanently until you turn eighteen.

‘Richard has used a pod, and he hasn’t been affected.’

‘I said that’s enough,’ mum said louder and stronger, causing me to stop talking. ‘My answer is no. Alright.’ What was a mature debate had turned into an annoying argument between child and mother, and that’s not what I had wanted to happen, at all, which means I might have ruined my chances of being able to play in a pod – the biggest backfire in a long while. At least I have proven that I can hold my own for a while. If I was able to stay under the line, I might have twisted mum’s arm enough to make her say yes.

I sat in silence all the way home. My attention was caught by the many cool-looking cars that we were passing along the A14. All I knew about them were that they were old. They were also being driven by people who looked like they knew what they would be talking about if you struck up a conversation about the cars, and they were elderly as well. Either they built the cars up almost from scratch, or they had enough money to buy it. Well, if they had to build it almost from scratch, then they would have had enough money also, but I have heard from my dad that they some of them do cost at least over a million pounds, which sometimes, is a lot more than it costs to repair one. Whatever he cost, they look awesome, and I would love to drive one of them.

We turned off the A14 onto a slip road leaving the olden-styled cars behind as they were off to some car show or something along those lines. Wherever they are going, I’m sure that my friend, Triston’s dad will be there to take photos and ask questions. If he had the chance, I’m sure he would actually live on the road and travel across the country, following all these old cars wherever they go, but unfortunately he has to stay put, sitting behind his desk at his office, wishing he was somewhere else entirely.

We pulled into our driveway and parked outside the garage. We used to park the car in the garage, but gradually mum and dad grew too lazy to keep opening the garage door, so they resorted to keeping the car outside and over time the garage turned into a space room full of assorted junk.

Mum turned the engine off, put the handbrake on, and pushed the button to pop the boot. We both hopped out and walked around to the back of the car where mum handed me the two bags I was carrying earlier and picked up the rest before closing the boot with her hand through the handles once more.

‘Your dad won’t be home for another couple of hours,’ mum explained, ‘by which time I would like you to have had a bath and sorted out today’s shopping.’ She fished out the front door keys and pushed them into the lock before turning it to open the front door. We both stepped through. ‘I’m going to cook spaghetti for dinner tonight,’ she continued, closing the door behind me. She’s acting as if she had forgotten our conversation we had earlier, but mum being mum, I know she wouldn’t have, so the wrong words said at the wrong time would get me in trouble. I had better stay clear of that subject for a while. A long while, actually (unfortunately).

‘Are you listening,’ mum said loudly, making me jump.

‘Yes,’ I said.

‘What did I say, then?’ she asked. Why can’t she just believe me when I say yes instead of making me prove it.

‘Dad won’t be home for a couple of hours. I need to have a bath, then sort out today’s shopping, whilst you cook spaghetti,’ I said robotically. Mum didn’t like my attitude, but she let it slide for now as I had at least proved that I was listening to her.

‘OK,’ she said simply. ‘Oh, and another thing,’ she said as I was heading upstairs whilst taking off my coat. I stopped and turned around to face her once more. ‘Make sure you clean your room before you go back to school,’ she said. Ugh, I hate cleaning my room. It doesn’t make any sense why I have to constantly clean it when I spend more time out of it than in it, and when I am in it, I’m asleep. But if I have to do it, then I guess I have to do it.

I continued running up the stairs where I took my coat and shoes off, and headed into the bathroom.

***

The next day, when I ran downstairs and into the living room, my dad was the only person awake and up and about. He had just come back from the shops with a magazine, which was rolled up under his arm as he took his boots off.

‘Morning, Lucas,’ dad said walking through the hallway to living room and saw me sitting on the sofa with the TV remote in my hands. Today is Saturday meaning my favourite shows are on back to back from early morning to mid-morning. I always make sure to wake up early enough so I don’t miss any of the shows.

My mum likes to sleep in during the weekend, and my dad always heads off down to the local newsagents for his magazine, which he is now reading quietly beside me whilst I flicked through the channels until I landed on the one with all the shows on.

The adverts were on at the moment, but any minute now, the first show will start.

‘After you’ve watched your shows,’ dad said with his nose buried deep inside the magazine, ‘I thought we could head out together to see a film or something.’ My eyes were immediately attached to the cover of the magazine as I couldn’t see his face.

‘Really!’ I said, excited. I knew I had a massive grin on my face, but I didn’t care.

‘Is there a particular film you would like to see?’ he asked me.

‘Well, there is this one film that is a massive hit,’ I explained.

‘You’re too young to see Destroy all Zombies,’ dad said sternly. ‘If you were here, then maybe, but you won’t be able to see it in the cinema, even when accompanied by an adult.’

‘Oh,’ I said disappointingly.

‘But, there has to be another one that you really want to see. If there isn’t, then we could do something else. Bowling? Penny machines by the beach?...’

I didn’t let him say the third option. I love the penny machines. They are so satisfying. Watching the penny drop and push all those other pennies forward until the point when gravity takes hold and they fall down so you can begin all over again. There’s nothing better. My dad saw my grin grow and that was all he needed to see to know that we’re going to the penny machines by the beach. It would be awesome if I could walk away with a prize. There’s a strong sense that you’ve actually earnt that prize when it falls down along with even more pennies. There really is nothing better.

The adverts ended and the opening credits of the first show began. I snapped my attention back to the TV and didn’t look away until the shows had ended – during which time I had my breakfast. Afterwards, I rushed upstairs to get myself dressed and brush my teeth.

Mum was just stepping out of the bathroom, dressed and with a towel around her head to help dry her hair better.

‘Morning,’ she said.

‘Dad and I are going to play on the penny machines by the beach,’ I said barely containing my excitement. I was jumping up and down.

‘That’s awesome,’ mum said, smiling. ‘But when you get back, you need to clean your room.’

‘But mum,’ I groaned. What a way to ruin the excitement.

‘No buts. If you don’t do it this afternoon, you won’t do it at all, and it needs to be tidied before you go back to school, is that clear,’ she said.

‘Yes, mum,’ I bowed my head.

‘No go and have fun,’ she said

My smile came back. Just because I’m going to have a boring afternoon, doesn’t mean I can’t have a boring morning. I need to make every second count.

It was the fastest I ever got myself ready. So fast that I even surprised my parents, who were still getting ready when I ran downstairs, with my shoes and coat on.

‘Woah,’ dad said chuckling. ‘Now if we had said that we’re going shopping, you would take forever. Remember to use that trick next time,’ he whispered to my mum. I heard what he said, but I pretended that I didn’t. I will be ready when the time comes.

***

The time had come for my dad and I to leave the house and go to the penny machines by the beach. I ran to the car and tried to open the passenger side door only to discover that my dad hadn’t unlocked it yet.

‘Steady on, there, mate. If you keep going like that, you’re going to do yourself an injury.’ He was glad that I was excited, so it wasn’t a stern warning or anything, just a casual remark.

‘Sorry,’ I felt obligated to say and sat in the passenger seat as patiently as I could whilst my dad climbed in beside me and started to back out of the driveway. The beach is at an odd distance. It’s too far away to walk as by the time you eventually get there, it’s more or less time to turn around and head home again, but when you’re going by car, it’s only but a few minutes down the road, making it seem as if using the car was pointless. Although, it could be because the roads my mum and dad travel on are hardly ever busy, allowing us to shoot straight through without any hassle, or every time I head to the beach, I’m so excited that it seems as if it the journey is shorter than it actually is. I’m going to say that it’s a bit of both – half and half, if you will. I cannot remember the last time the roads were busy, and I have had to go to the beach in a mood other than excitement. So maybe the beach isn’t at an odd distance after all, it’s just an illusion. Whatever the reason is, the illusion is successful with doing its job and making me confused.

‘You were quiet the whole journey, is everything alright?’ dad asked genuinely concerned as he has never known me to be like this when heading to the penny machines, or to anywhere that’s fun before.

‘I was just in a world of my own,’ I shrugged.

‘Well, alright,’ dad said in such a way that he was going to keep an eye on me for the rest of the time to make sure that things are, and will remain, fine.

The Penny Machines were awesome. They always are awesome so I don’t know what else I was expecting. Dad and I spent hours dropping 1ps, 2ps, and 5ps into the machines, watching them tumble down onto all the others, and then watch as they are pushed forwards. I had my eye on a dinosaur keyring and I was not going to give up until it fell down into the tray underneath. I remained at the 1ps machine for the longest amount of time as I tried everything I could to make that keyring fall, and when it eventually did, the high level of satisfaction that came with it was almost unparalleled to the many other times I’ve successfully won a prize with these machines.

‘Hey, congratulations,’ dad said, making me jump as I had only just noticed he was standing behind me, watching me.

‘Don’t do that,’ I said, but he only chuckled. He didn’t mean anything bad by it. It was pretty funny, as well.

Dad looked at the time, ‘it’s quarter to one. We had better get back. You have a room to clean.’

‘Do I have to?’ I asked.

‘It’s your mother’s orders, not mine, but even I agree that it needs a tidy. Come on, before she gets mad at us,’ and so I walked away from the machines, never to return for quite some time to come.

I was sitting in the car, looking a bit disappointed. I probably shouldn’t be, because all good things come to an end eventually. It was only a matter of time before I had to walk away from the machines anyway. Even if we did stay, they would have closed for the night, meaning we would have had to leave no matter what. It’s a shame, but there’s nothing I can do about it, so I guess I just have to accept it and move on.

Dad accompanied me in the car and put his seatbelt on. I had mine already in its holder. He saw that I was a bit down, but as much as I was unable to do anything, he was equally unable.

He started the car and we pulled away. I fell back into my own world for a different reason. I wasn’t thinking about an illusion or something interesting that I saw on the way home, I was just sitting there in silence, watching the world go by – the many cars that flew past us going in the opposite direction; how the distant trees appear to be moving at a slower speed than the ones on the side of the road we’re on, which is in relation to an illusion, but I wasn’t focusing on it as much as I was before; and how a particular cloud looks eerily like a dolphin, and I mean almost an exact copy floating around in the middle of the blue sky, on its own with all the other clouds so far away.

Hang on, I don’t remember there being so many trees before.

‘Where are we going?’ I asked dad.

‘We’re popping into town,’ he said without explaining anything else. I know how my dad is, and when he does something like this, he is basically saying in his own way that he’s got a surprise for me. It didn’t take me long before I picked up on his intentions. I guess it was around about the third time he acted all cryptically did I officially pick up on what he actually meant. Immediately, two questions popped into my head: What did I do to deserve a sudden surprise? What surprise is it? When it comes to surprises, I would like to say that I’m good at figuring them out, but I have to admit that I’m not in the slightest. I mean, I ask all the right questions, but when it comes to answering them, I tend to jump to the wrong conclusions. Only once did I actually figure it out properly, and that was when mum had ordered a bouncy castle to one of my birthday parties a few years back. That was easily one of the best birthdays. That was rather easy to work out, to be honest, because the clues were so in-your-face. Other times, I have not a clue, including this time. I have no a clue as to why my dad is taking me into town. I still have yet to work out what I did to deserve a surprise.

The road with all the trees down either side came to an end and dad turned right onto the road that would take us straight into town. There is no gradual increase of shops. There’s nothing except houses and more trees, then suddenly you’re in the middle of the high street surrounded by plenty of shops. This can be a little disorientating – enough to make my mum and dad miss the turning for the carpark at least, so we had to go up to the roundabout at the very end to turn around and come back.

‘I’ve done it again,’ dad said when he passed the turning once more. ‘You would think that with the amount of times I’ve come here, I would know where the turning is, but no, I always miss it. One of these days I’ll learnt, but unfortunately it isn’t today,’ he was talking to himself more than me out of annoyance, but I continued the conversation on nevertheless.

‘When you don’t want the turning, do you always notice it?’ I asked jokingly.

‘Yes, frustratingly,’ dad said as he changed down gears as we neared the roundabout, which he entered and swung right the way round before heading back on ourselves and back through the high street where he saw the turning coming from a long way away. He slowed down enough so that we could swing round steadily, and accelerated smoothly until we were at sitting comfortable on the speed limit, before he slowed down once more to turn into the carpark.

‘Now, wait there for a minute whilst I go and pay at the machine,’ dad said unbuckling his seatbelt and getting out of the car. The machine where you pay for a ticket to stick to your window screen was right next door. My parents love parking here because it saves them a walk right across the carpark. You could say they’re lazy, but I like to call it, saving time. The mystery that I have now, though, is why does my dad need to pay for a ticket anyway. He only ever needs to when we’re planning on spending either a whole morning or afternoon in town, or the entire day. Whenever they need to just pop down to the shops, they usually park along the road and walk back from there. There are no double yellow lines much to many people’s annoyance, just a single yellow line, meaning we’re allowed to park there for a couple of hours only. So what could my dad be planning?

‘Come on,’ dad said after he had stuck the ticket against the window. I unbuckled my belt and hopped out of the car. Dad pressed the button to lock it, and again to set the alarm, and told me to stay close as we headed into town, which can only be achieved by crossing a rather busy road – the one we came down just before we entered the road for the carpark. There is a zebra crossing (there’s two actually) but that doesn’t stop people from driving how they want and doing whatever they want. You still have to keep your wits about you, a phrase that I have yet to fully learn.

We stopped outside the one shop I least expected. The gaming shop that included the five Virtual Reality Simulation Systems. I don’t fully understand what’s going on. Is my dad really going to let me do something that my mum explained in detail why I couldn’t? Dad saw my confused expression and smiled.

‘Come on,’ he said. What do I do now? Should I say something about what my mum said. He probably knows what she had said, so I don’t have to say anything. Am I going to get in trouble? I think this is meant to be a secret, in which case why would my dad be keeping secrets from my mum? I don’t think that’s my business to be questioning. I think I should just let things continue as they are. I have been wanting to have a go in one of these pods ever since they were released, and miraculously, my dad is actually letting me have a go. I should let him let me and have fun.

We stepped inside. There were four people sitting in allocated gaming chairs: Two of them were playing a racing game that I haven’t heard of, and two of them were playing a war game that I have heard of. They must have only just been released.

‘Hello,’ the man behind the counter said with a smile, ‘how can I help you today?’ My dad turned to me and told me to go over there and have a browse through the PS3 games, which I instantly went and done, even if I didn’t fully understand why he would tell me to do that if we’re in here to play on the pod. I probably shouldn’t as it’s too early to jump to conclusions, but I can’t help but think that we’re not in here for the pods after all.

It was only a couple of minutes before my dad called me over. When I turned around, I saw the man taking his hand out of his coat pocket. He looked rather happy with himself, for some reason.

‘Choose your pod,’ dad said.

‘You mean,’ I was shocked. My jaw hit the floor.

‘Yes, you are allowed to have a go in one of the pods,’ he said. This had to be a dream. I subtly pinched myself on the arm, and when the pain hit me, I knew I wasn’t in a dream. This was real, and awesome, and a miracle. My dad has instantly become the best dad in the world.

‘Can I have a go in that one,’ I pointed to nearest one. The man who runs the store stepped over to the pod and set things up so that it activated and the door opened.

‘You can climb in now,’ he said, which I did, excitedly. ‘Now, before I close the door, I must go over some pieces of information. The first thing is, once the door is closed, it won’t open again until either you choose to quit the game or if there is a sudden malfunction or the building suffers from a freak power cut. Once the pod is activated, you get to choose the map, and who to play against. Once the game has started, if it’s your first time, you may feel a little disorientated, but that’s perfectly normal and will wear off in moments. However, it is possible for you to experience some disorientation even if it’s not your first time, but again, that’s perfectly normal and will wear off in moments. If the disorientation continues, it is recommended to quit the game immediately. Once the game has started, it won’t stop until one of you has lost, or there’s a malfunction, or a freak power cut, or you choose to quit the game,’ I nodded to establish that I understand.

‘Are there any questions before we start?’ he asked, but I shook my head as I just wanted to get playing the game.

‘Then settle down and have fun,’ he said. I laid down on my back, and he shut the door, locking me in the pod. It was total darkness for a brief moment before the pod activated. Green lights ran down from my head to my feet, and the screen in front of me flashed on.

‘Hello and welcome to the Virtual Reality Simulation System,’ a disembodied woman’s voice said whilst I had strapped myself into my pod, ready for a good afternoon’s gaming. ‘The team at VRSS Corporation has spent decades developing the most advanced gaming platform in the world. Once you have made yourself comfortable, the pod will transport your mind to a new world, completely virtual.

‘Once there, your aim is to beat your opponent and win. Throughout the world, hidden in various places are weapons. Any weapon that has been developed will be at your disposal during the game. Also, throughout the world, there will be certain icons that you can activate. These will give you the special weapons. But be careful, because some weapons you may find may not be on your side.

‘The world is completely random, meaning you will never play on the same map twice, unless you add it to your favourites. You can select if you would like everything randomised, or everything to your liking. The choice is totally up to you.’

According to this option, “Configure Your Own Game”, I will then be able to pick exactly what I would like, but then I saw the option, “Quick-Play”, with the description, “be transported to a random game immediately”, which sounded tempting. This is my first time ever playing this inside this system, so it might be better if I let the pod choose the game’s settings for me. On the other hand, because this my first time, and will probably be the only time for quite some time to come, I might want to make it the best game possible by picking what I want. The best possible experience could come from the system picking the settings for me. Again, because this is my first time, I don’t know anything about how this works, and I don’t really want to spend too much time trying to figure that out. Maybe next time.

I selected, “Quick-Play”, and instantly, another screen flashed up with the words.

“You are now going to be transported to a virtual world. Thank you for using the Virtual Reality Simulation System. Please close your eyes and relax.”

‘You may experience some disorientation when you enter the virtual world, but that is normal and will go away in moments. If the disorientation continues, it is recommended to stop playing immediately,’ the woman’s voice is now repeating what the man in the shop is saying. I already know this part, so I stopped listening and made myself comfortable, ready to enter the other world.

I have no clue as to what I am expecting. My friend, Richard, said that it was the same as falling asleep. I learnt a new word the other day, ominous, and its meaning. I have to say that what Richard said was ominous, but I shouldn’t be worried. I know it’s nothing to be scared about. The system has been out for ages, and there has been no documented case where someone has been injured or otherwise whilst using the system. I am a little nervous, though. This is my first time after all, and I don’t want anything to go wrong.

I closed my eyes and relaxed. My shoulders slumped down, and my breathing slowed right down. I could feel the muscles all over my body lose all their tension.

‘You are now going to be transported to the virtual world. I hope you enjoy the experience,’ the disembodied woman’s voice spoke softly.

Richard was right; there is no way to describe it other than as if you were simply falling asleep, except different somehow. I am awake, yet asleep at the same time, but it’s not a dream, because my mind is being transported to a virtual world. Or the virtual world is being projected into my mind. I don’t fully understand the concepts that are going on here, but whatever is happening, it is pretty much the same as falling asleep really quickly. There was darkness for a while as all I could see were the inside of my eyelids, but then images started to fade in gradually, or I was going towards them. There really was no way of telling considering all there was surrounding it was darkness.

Am I already asleep, then? Is it really that simple? Well, that’s not like falling asleep at all. In fact, there was hardly any feeling. That’s strange. Strange is a feeling. I don’t…

***

I’m standing in the middle of a multi-story carpark. There are plenty of incredibly expensive cars dotted all around me. I don’t know hardly any makes of cars, but the way they shone, and from what I can remember seeing in certain magazines that listed some cars that a lot of people want, every single one of them were here in this carpark. The carpark itself is shrouded in shadow. The only light source is the many tiny lights above. I looked up and one of the lights caught me directly in the eye, creating a small diamond-like piece of light in my eye. When my vision had quickly recovered, I saw the concrete pillars holding up the floor above me, and I was completely blown away by how realistic they all were. The cars, the lights, the textures. I took a step forward and the ground beneath me actually feels as hard as concrete would if I were in the real world. Of course this was virtual, but it doesn’t get any more realistic than this.

From what Richard told me, I need to find a weapon. They could be anywhere in this world, and I don’t know how big this world actually is. I need to know where the other person is in this world, I also don’t know how experienced he is at this game. For all I know, he could have played this game multiple times already. I’m beginning to think that I’ve made the wrong choice before I’ve even left this building. Richard told me that the world he was in was huge, which proved to be a problem when it comes to finding a weapon. He told me that the best thing to do is just look for one, but if you can, look in the least expected place because you never know where one might just be.

This isn’t like any other game where the weapons you want are just lying about for you to pick up whenever you need them, you actually have to search for them. Apparently there are plenty of games that require you to search, but I haven’t played or been informed of them. GTA V only allows that when you’re in a mission, but when you’re free-roaming, you can’t – unless you’re either being chased by the Police, or buying them from the shop. That’s an idea, if there’s a shop around here, maybe there would be some weapons in there, either on the shelves or behind the counter. It would be handy if they were, as that would save time searching and worrying. Of course, I have to find a shop first, which means I have to leave this multi-story carpark first, which also means, leaving my potential cover. I’m not going to stay in here forever. I’m going to venture forward because that’s the game. Now where’s the exit?

***

The artificial sunlight’s bright. There are no clouds in the sky. If I were to step outside in the real world and see this level of brightness, I would actually think that I’m dreaming. I covered my eyes with my hands as they slowly but surely focused enough so that I wouldn’t be seeing blurry shapes all the time. The longer I stood in one spot, the hotter I became. This is a very realistic simulation, and that’s awesome. Soon, it got too hot me to bare so I stepped into the shadow. It was an instant reaction. The coolness hit my arms and my face, and my face muscles were allowed to relax after being so screwed up for a long time. I was no finally able to see what this world looked like, and I must say that it is a huge area.

Skyscrapers reaching up high into the sky. The level of detail that has been put into each and every single one of them. I stepped up to one of the windows and I saw that a small smudge just off centre. I turned back around to see what else was in this world and I saw traffic lights, more skyscrapers, more traffic lights, and more skyscrapers, and on the roads were no cars except for the odd one or two parked on the side, or on the pavement. I saw no shops though, which may prove difficult for me. I may have to change my plans. I can at least go exploring. I do have to keep a look out for my opponent as I’m doing that, which made me realise that I am in the middle of the open. They could see me from anyone of these skyscrapers. If I could find a weapon now, that would be rather helpful.

As I’m walking down along the pavement, I accidentally kick a stone which bounces along and off into the road, where it falls down into a drain and lands with a soft splash into the water below. That made me stop in my tracks and admire the virtual world for a second. The incredible advancements technology has made over the past few years is staggering. My mind has officially been blown.

Coming back to my senses, I carry on forward with the hope of finding anything that would be useful in the eventual battle between me and my opponent. He could literally be anywhere in this world: Either on the other side, or just beside me in this building. With that thought in mind, I quickened my pace. If I’m to stay focused, I need to stop admiring the scenery and instead play the game. That’s what I’m here for, after all.

In between each building, an alleyway leads to what appears to be a dead end, although one or two does seem to carry on round a corner. It’s hard to see properly when they are completely covered in shadow. With what I could see however, made my mouth drop once more. I shouldn’t be surprised as this. I know that I’m currently laying inside a very powerful piece of technology, and I fully expected what I’m seeing here, in some sense, but in truth, seeing the bins, all the pieces of rubbish that are overflowing, the small puddles that the sun hasn’t been able to evaporate yet, just made this world seem that little bit more realistic than it already was, even though I completely know and understand that it’s virtual, made of pixels and coding – it just doesn’t seem real, for lack of a better phrase. This won’t be an experience I will forget in a while. I may never forget anything about this. It will certainly be something that I can talk to my friends with when I get back to school. I wonder how many people have actually used one of these in my school. I’m not part of their group, and that’s awesome. Richard and I are both included in that group. I will know what they are talking about.

That’s a strange feeling, to be honest, knowing that I’m now a part of something I’ve wanted to be a part of for a long time. Walking down this street, seeing all this detail, feeling the realness of it all, it would give me a lot to talk about. It’s something that I will always be a part of, even if this is my only go with the pods for a while…

A loud bang came from behind me. I stopped in my tracks, my heart immediately wanting to carry on without me as it tried to force its way out of my chest. What the heck could that have been? It could have literally been anything. Should I take cover now? That’s not a question I should ponder about, I suggest I take cover now and stay there until I’ve figured out what to do next.

Ducking into one of the alleyways, the shadow washing over me, cooling my body temperature down again, which in turn slowed my heart rate down slightly. What did that sound sound like? It was just a large bang. Was it a gun firing, or something falling? The more I think about it, it sounded as if something fell over. It was a large object, that’s all I know. It could have been small object falling from a high place, which makes sense considering we are surrounded by skyscrapers. My opponent is somewhere in this world; he could have caused that sound.

I’m stuck in this alleyway, with no way of knowing what to do next. I need a weapon. Once I’ve found one of them, then I should be alright. I’m not exactly hidden. I’m standing in the middle of this alleyway. I need to hide. Looking around, I see a dumpster. It might not be the best places, but if it keeps me from my opponent seeing me, then I have nothing to complain about. Crouching behind the dumpster, the strong smell hit my nose, and soon after my eyes, making them water. The smell of rotten rubbish is strong, almost to the point of making me gag. This really is as realistic as it can possibly get, isn’t it? No other virtual world can be any more realistic.

As I’m crouching, my legs quickly become tired and ache. I can’t stay in this position any longer, and the noise hasn’t happened again, neither as my opponent showed themselves yet. Maybe it was just a false alarm. Should I risk it? I don’t know. I think I should, just because I can’t stay behind here. I need to move. I stood up but before I could step out from behind the dumpster and back out into the open, my vision suddenly went blurry and my head felt weightless. I stood up too quickly. My balance suffered from the sudden side-effects and I actually had to take a step backwards to keep me from falling over, which is when I heard something scrape across the floor. Something metal. The moment I had resumed to my normal-self, I looked down to see what I had kicked and I saw a pistol laying in the middle of the alleyway.

Picking the pistol up, I probably should have expected the heaviness, but I didn’t and so my wrist wasn’t ready for the weight and I struggled to pick it up. Once I had a firm grip, however, I stood up with it in my hands. The weight was making the muscles in my arms protest. It’s heavy. Heavier than I had expected. It wasn’t long before I had to hold it with both hands. I really didn’t think I was that weak. Well, I didn’t have any need to be any stronger until now, and I wasn’t expecting to be in this position so, again, there was no need for me to be any stronger. Richard didn’t say anything about how heavy the pistols were, though, but he’s always been stronger than I am, and I’ve never really figured out how that could be because he doesn’t go to the gym, and I didn’t see any weights around his house when I went round a while back. Maybe he’s just naturally stronger than I am, or something.

The more I’m studying this pistol, the more details pop up. There’s a rather nice-looking pattern of zig-zagging lines running down the handle, and the metal started to warm up the longer I held it. The details are all well and good, but I have no idea how to actually use one of these. All the characters in the other games that I play just reload just like that after I’ve pressed a button, or they do so automatically if they’re run out of ammo. Here, I’m the character, meaning I have to be the one reloading. I need to know how to reload this pistol if I am to continue.

Fiddling around with it for a few minutes, I eventually spot the latch that releases the holder where the bullets sit. My weapon language is poor, I know. I look inside and see that it was fully loaded. Richard told me that the first weapon he found – I can’t remember exactly what it was – it had no ammo in, so I guess I got lucky. Makes me wonder how my opponent’s doing. Did he get as lucky as I did, or is he having a hard time finding anything? And with that, I’m back to worrying about that sound again. No one appeared, nothing else banged, so it must have just been something falling by itself. With the lack of evidence, I have no choice but to say it is, but I really don’t want to. My opponent could literally be anywhere. This world just got a lot smaller.

This pistol was starting to make both my arms ache. Do I have anywhere to store it, or will I have to hold it in my hands from now on? Well, judging by the lack of pockets, other than my trouser pockets which are way too small to hold a weapon such as this, I will have to hold it in my hands.

If I am to keep hidden but continue moving forward, the best thing to do is stay in the alleyway. Unfortunately for me, this particular one has a dead end so I have to turn back and head back into the open. My opponent doesn’t appear to be anywhere at the moment, so maybe I can get away with it. I have my weapon if they show up suddenly. I am expecting them to have their own, but at least I can defend myself when they do show themselves.

The heat from the sun hit me hard. I didn’t notice how cool my body had become when in the shadows. My eyes had to adjust once more, but not as much as before, which I was happy about. Looking both right and left, I see nothing except skyscrapers, cars, and traffic lights. No shops, no houses, no anything except a built up area.

Knowing that anything can happen at any time is the worst. The quietness – lack of people, lack of anything except just me wondering around, not knowing what to do or what’s going to happen. I’ve never felt tension like this before. Back when I was playing my games at home, the only tension I ever felt was only when I thought I wouldn’t be able to complete one of the missions after doing it so many times and each time getting so close. This is totally different. I’m not looking at a screen, I’m inside it. I remember watching a programme when I was younger about a person getting trapped in their computer screen. It was really scary and my want to find out what happens next overruled the knowledge that I was going to get scared about half way through and probably wish I hadn’t started watching it. I’m now in that screen, but I’m not as scared as I was whilst watching it. Why is that? I’m feeling the tension, but I’m not as scared as I feel I should be.

The first expression that I ever learnt was, “I spoke too soon”. My dad used to say it all the time, and my mum used to say it now and again. Now it’s my turn.

‘I spoke too soon,’ I said aloud. Another loud bang came from behind me. This time, followed by a glass breaking suddenly above me. I look up and I saw that a window had smashed and it was falling down on top of me. I ran out of the way, letting the glass smash against the ground. I stood in the open, watching as the glass broke into thousands of pieces right in front of me – a move that I shouldn’t have done as another bang came from in front of me this time and another window smashed. Instead of being above me, it was right beside me. The glass pieces fell all over my feet.

Why am I not running away? A question I should have thought of before. Ducking into yet another alleyway – there was no dumpster to hide behind. This alleyway was empty, and it had a dead end so I couldn’t hide around the corner. I can’t move. If I step outside, I would be a target. If I stay here… I don’t know. I don’t know what to do. Where’s my opponent? I don’t know what to do. What would I do in the games that I play? Fight back because that’s the mission. Can I fight back? I don’t know. Should I fight back? I don’t know. This is bad. This is really bad.

The bangs have stopped. No more glass has shattered. What’s happening now? I have my pistol in my hands. I’m holding it tightly. My arms are already starting to ache. My heart is beating faster than ever. My breathing has increased – it’s also louder. I don’t want my opponent to hear me here, but I can’t hide so there is no point in trying to calm down. I have to do something. I need to do something, that’s why I’m here.

An idea hits me. I look down on the floor to see if I could find any more weapons. None. Empty. I’m trapped and I don’t know what to do. I really wish I knew what to do. Richard told me that he was stuck in a difficult position. He only escaped because he ran away. He lost his battle. His opponent beat him. He says he was close to winning, and I believe him. He also told me that he didn’t know what to do. He took the only option he could, which is run away. I can’t do that. I can’t run away. I can only run back out into the open where my opponent is firing at me. I don’t want to lose this battle. They don’t want to lose this battle. That’s why we’re fighting. And I don’t know what to do.

Silence. Tension. Horror. Scared. No ideas.

My hands are wet. I’m sweating. The pistol is growing heavier and heavier, and my hands are slowly making metal turn into soap. I don’t know how long I can keep this up. I have to move somewhere. I don’t want to make a noise. I want to stay as quiet as possible. Is this what Richard felt? He said it was awesome. He said that it would want to do it again. Do I want to do this again? Is what is happening now awesome? It’s a game. It’s not real. I’m standing in a virtual world. If I lose, the pod will open and I’ll be back with my dad who’s waiting for me now. He doesn’t know what’s happening. He can’t help me. Richard can’t help me. Mum can’t help me. What would she say if she found out that I’m here? Why did my dad let me be here? Should I quit the game? I don’t want to lose. I want to win.

More silence. More tension. More horror. More scared. No ideas.

Stay calm. I can win. I can beat my opponent. This is a game. I’m inside a game… No ideas.

This is my first time. I’m not going to know what I’m doing. This could be my opponent’s first time. This could also be my opponent’s fourth time playing this game. Maybe I shouldn’t have picked “Quick-Play”. Setting up my own games sounds a lot easier now. I think I regret coming here. I’m stuck in an alleyway, and I have no ideas. I could run. I could simply run. I could lose. I may not. What do I do?

I think I should run. I’m going to run. It’s the only thing I can do. I don’t want to lose. If I run, I may not. It’s a game. I could lose at any time. I could win at any time. I’m going to run.

Then he appeared. I remember watching that program and seeing a shadow creep towards me before the enemy appeared. There wasn’t a shadow before he appeared. It was sudden. I jumped high and screamed suddenly as he walked towards me. I had my gun held up high, but he kept walking forward, as if he didn’t care. The closer he walked towards me, the more I was able to make out who he was. He looked to be about my dad’s age – forty years old, and he looked scary. Mean. He, too had a pistol in his hand, and it was sturdy. His hands weren’t sweating with nerves.

I held up my gun. I didn’t pull the trigger.

When I’m playing games at home, I just play the game. I can’t pull the trigger. My hands are shaking. My heart is pounding. My breathing is fast and loud. I’m stepping backwards, hoping that I can disappear. He continues walking forward. Calmly – scarily. I don’t want to lose. He doesn’t want to lose. I’m afraid, so afraid.

I collide with the wall behind me. I’ve reached the alleyway’s dead end, and still he walks forward. This would be a good time to fade through the wall. I’ve only just noticed that my arm has dropped down beside me, the gun almost slipping out of my hand, and yet he continues walking forward. How long is this alleyway? Please, help me. Somebody help me?

He stops walking.

He raises his gun.

I closed my eyes.

…

…

…

Nothing.

‘What?’ he said.

I open my eyes. He’s standing exactly where he was before I closed my eyes. His own gun has dropped by his side, but it doesn’t seem to be falling out.

‘What?’ he said again.

What’s wrong? What’s happened? Has the game got a problem? Should I run? Should I stay here? Should I ask what’s wrong? I don’t know. What do I do now?

‘But…’ He’s shocked. Why is he shocked? He’s looking right at me. What have I done? Have I won?

‘But, you’re just a child,’ he said. ‘How were you allowed to play this game, you’re too young.’

‘I’m fourteen, actually,’ I corrected automatically. I hate when they say I’m a child. I’m a teenager. A child and a teenager are two different things. I wasn’t expecting to be talkative. I thought I had lost my voice from being scared and too nervous to do anything about it.

‘That doesn’t make any difference,’ he said. Yes, it does. ‘You’re too young to be in here. From afar I thought you were a lot older than fourteen. You shouldn’t be in here.’ I don’t get what’s going on here. Of course I’m allowed in here, my dad and the person in the store said I could be.

‘My dad said I could be,’ I corrected him again, and again it was an automatic response. Whoever this person is, if he’s going to argue with me, he had better get his facts right. The fact that I’m correcting him states that he doesn’t have a leg to stand on.

‘Well, yes, of course,’ he said in a tone of voice that I think was sarcasm. ‘If you’re dad said that it’s OK, then yes, I should continue with the game and end it right here and now, but you’re too young to understand why I just cannot do that,’ he explained. ‘This isn’t right. This isn’t how things should be. I thought there were rules, but apparently they’re just as useless as a chocolate teapot.’ He was angry. I just stood where I was, wondering what to do. He’s talking to me so I should talk back. No, he’s talking to himself – I think.

‘Let me guess, you like playing games such as Call of Duty, Battlefield, GTA, and you thought that this game was going to be exactly the same. I can tell that you now know that’s not true.’

‘I know that this is a game…’ I was going to continue, but he cut be off before I could.

‘I can tell that you now know that’s not true,’ he repeated. ‘The moment you saw me come round that corner, you didn’t know what to do. From the look on your face when you were against that wall, the fact that this is all just a game went out of the window. This suddenly became real for you. That’s what you don’t understand. This is a different experience altogether; you are the character you are controlling. You thought that this would be the same experience. You thought you would be able to run around as freely as any other character in your eighteen rated games, but you thought wrong.’

‘This is my first time…’ Again he cut me off before I could continue.

‘I gathered that much,’ he laughed. ‘I’ve been playing these games for a few months now, sometimes more than once a day, and I have met many people who are entering this world for the first time. They have not a clue as to what to do. Hardly any of them expect what is to come, and neither did I when I first started. I put up a good fight, but in the end I lost. But do you know what all those people have in common?’ he answered the question before I could guess. ‘They were all above the age of eighteen, except one, who was playing on their eighteenth birthday. They have gained enough knowledge to know the difference. Being as young as you are, no matter how much you may think you know – you can believe you know how this world works, but you don’t know just how impressionable you really are. Of course you know how the world works, but from the perspective of a fourteen-year-old. When you’re fifteen, so much can change in so little time, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen. So much knowledge can be learnt in just one day, it’s almost impossible to know how much can be learnt in a year. All those people who’ve entered this world for the first time, they all understood all of this. You’re too young to understand that, don’t you see.’

Something about what he just said there doesn’t quite make sense.

‘My mum once told me something that I’m never going to forget.’ He looked at me with a strange expression before smiling, but I continued talking as I had suddenly found my confidence. ‘She told me that you never stop learning. She told me that there are moments when she doesn’t have a clue what to do. You think that just because you turn eighteen, you know everything. How many times have you learnt something new?’ Where did that last part come from. I can’t show how surprised I am as that would give the game away. I stood my ground.

‘Of course you never stop learning. There has been plenty of times when I needed to learn a new thing to continue on with my tasks, but the older you get, the less impressionable you become.’

‘I’m not sure if I can believe that,’ I said.

‘Believe what you want. One day you will understand what I’m talking about,’ he said casually.

‘One day maybe, but that doesn’t make it any more true,’ I countered.’ He looked at me in silence. Again, his expression was hard to read.

‘Whatever you understand, whatever impression the world has on you and on me, you standing there, and me standing here, it’s wrong. It’s wrong in so many ways.’

‘You’re not going to end the game?’ I asked. ‘You’re not going to win when given the chance.’

‘Are you not listening,’ he said angrily. ‘You see, that’s my point. That is exactly my point. I can’t do that. I just cannot do that because you’re too young. You’re not supposed to be in here, and how do you think that makes me feel. How do you think that makes you feel?’

‘I figured out that this was a different experience altogether from the start of the game,’ I corrected him again. ‘I saw the detail, I felt the sun’s heat, I felt the shadow’s coolness, and I smelt the smell of the rubbish. I knew that this was as real as it got, yet still knew that it was made of pixels and coding, therefore completely fake. Fictional.’ I stood up from leaning against the wall. Truth be told, I wasn’t expecting to be saying all of this, but I am and so I will make sure he listens to it. ‘I didn’t know what to do because this was my first time. You could have been anywhere. You could have been behind me this whole time, in front of me. You could have been in the carpark where I spawned in. How could I have predicted the unpredictable?’ That felt good.

‘No one can,’ he agreed with me for once. ‘You are right. This is as real as it gets, but is still completely, one-hundred percent fictional. Well, in that case,’ he said dropping his pistol on the floor and raising his arms up so they were outstretched beside him, ‘why don’t you just end this game right here, right now?’ he asked. ‘Go ahead,’ he continued when he saw my surprised expression, ‘I give you the chance to win your first game. You might want to take that because I doubt anybody else will from now on,’ and he just stood there, in silence. I stood in front of him, also in silence. He broke that silence when he saw that I was confused. ‘The difference between reality and fiction. You know where one ends and the other starts. The thickness of the line is purely determined by your perception of your understanding. If you reckon that you know how thick that line is, then go ahead and win this battle.’

I just stood there.

We just stood there. The pistol hadn’t fallen out of my hand yet. The handle was caught between my fingers; the sweat had dried up during our conversation, creating more grip. It would be cool if I were to tell Richard that I won my first battle when he didn’t win his. I’ll be a member of a separate group then; a group where only a few people are in. The group’s unique. The only one of its kind, where members can only be a part of if they won their first battle. How many people in my school can say that?

I gripped my pistol better. It sat in my hands. I raised it up. I couldn’t stretch my arms outwards as that would put pressure on my arms. I had to keep them bent. My index finger was on the trigger. Ready. Primed.

He was staring at me. Silent. Into my eyes.

This is going to be realistic isn’t it? I’ve never fired a gun before. What reason would I have to need to? I don’t know what it’s going to be like? Richard said that the recoil is tremendous. He said that it was the loudest noise he’s ever heard. He said that it was the most different feeling he’s ever felt. He also said that he missed each and every single one that he fired, except one. Being a fictional world, when one of us loses, the game degenerates and the pod opens and we climb back out of it and back into the real world once more. A world where it won’t degenerate. I know that. I don’t need to remind myself.

He continued to stand in front of me with his arms outstretched. He won’t be saying another word until I’ve made up my mind. I don’t know how I know that, but I do. There’s something about the way he is right now that’s telling me that. His silence is speaking louder than words.

My arms were still outstretched, my pistol sat in my hands, my finger on the trigger, and all three were shaking uncontrollably. I’m about to do this. I’m about to fire. No one’s controlling me. I’m making this decision myself. I…

…

…

…

I can’t do it.

I lowered my pistol. This time, my fingers relaxed and it fell to the floor with a clatter of metal on concrete. He continued to stand there for a few seconds longer. Why? Does he really expect me to do that? I can’t. I won’t.

He lowered his arms.

‘And that’s why you shouldn’t be in here,’ he said, which lead me to ask him a question.

‘And you think you should be?’ I asked.

‘I don’t understand what you mean,’ he said.

‘How do you do it. I know the difference between reality and fiction. I know that we’re standing in a fictional world. A fake world. It will degenerate and disappear forever. But that doesn’t stop you from winning the game. How do you win?’

‘That’s what you’ll learn as you grow up,’ he said. ‘That’s why games have age ratings on them. That’s why you have to be eighteen to be in here. But to answer your question the best I can, to give you something to think about… Winning doesn’t just mean you’re better than your opponent.’

When I entered this world, I thought I knew what I was entering. I have a lot to learn. There is one piece of knowledge that I do know, and that’s…

‘You can’t end the game,’ I stated.

‘No. No I can’t end the game. It would be wrong. It isn’t how it should be.’

‘So, now what do we do, then?’ I asked him, genuinely not knowing.

‘There’s only one thing we can do,’ he shrugged, ‘we must quit the game. I think we should quit at the same time,’ he suggested. ‘You’ll understand why soon enough.’

‘How do I do that?’ I asked.

‘Just think up the menu and it will appear,’ he answered. That’s what I did. I imagined the menu being in front of me, and sure enough, a floating blue screen appeared in front of me, with the options, “Continue game”, and “Quit game” in the middle. I looked over to my opponent and saw that the same menu was in front of him as well.

‘Ready?’ he asked.

‘I’m ready when you are,’ I answered, with my finger on the “Quit game” button.

‘In three, two, one,’ and we both pressed the button together.

“DRAW GAME” were the words that immediately showed up afterwards. The menu disappeared, leaving us two standing in front of each other.

‘Now the world will begin to degenerate and the pod will open. I wish you all the best,’ he smiled, and the world disappeared. Nothing but white in every direction.

Then the white disappeared and there was nothing but black.

Then I realised that I was awake and opened my eyes. That transition was quick, and hardly any feeling.

‘Thank you for using one of the Virtual Reality Simulation System or VRSS for short,’ the disembodied woman said just before the pod switched off and the door opened.

‘So, how was it,’ dad said, smiling.

‘It was…’ What do I say? Do I tell him the truth? I think he should. I had planned on telling him everything, so I shouldn’t change my plans. Then again, it didn’t exactly go the way I had hoped. As unpredictable as every game is, I don’t think any of us was expecting what happened. There is only one answer I can give after an experience like that.

‘… Different.’

***

I sat in the car, waiting for my dad to climb in and drive us home. I haven’t said anything since my answer back at the shop. This is what it must feel like, to have so much running around in your head. I’ve seen my dad complain that there’s simply too much going on at any one time for him to fully concentrate on individually, which is why he sometimes gets stressed. My mum often says the same, although she seems to be more organised that my dad – I’m not entirely sure about that.

A lot happened in that world. My head is packed full of thoughts.

‘Right, then,’ dad said cheerfully as he closed the door after getting himself comfortable, ‘let’s get you home,’ and he started the engine.

This world looks different in some way. The sun looks identical to what it did this morning, so does the trees, so does the buildings, and so does the fields and the cars passing us on the road, but it looks different. It looks… real. They’re not made of pixels or coding. Every single leaf on every single tree is real. Every single car on every single part of the road is real. Every single field that stretches into the distance, sometimes beyond what I can see is completely and truly real.

It’s the exact some world as before…

But it’s different.

And I don’t feel as if that’s a bad thing. Well, I’ve yet to learn if that feeling is a bad thing or not. I have a lot to learn, I’m aware of that now. Richard didn’t appear to be experiencing the same reaction as me, so what does that mean? One day I will find out that answer, and when that time comes, I will be ready. Well, I have yet to learn if I will be ready or not. I know a lot, but this experience has taught me that I hardly know anything at all. Is that a bad thing or a good thing? How much knowledge should I know by this point? Will I ever be able to find the answers to those questions, or will it be an on-going search?

Before, I was taking each day and experiencing that alone. Now I’ve discovered that there is another part that comes with each day, and that’s the unknown. Tomorrow is unknown, even if we have planned ahead and organised exactly how things are going to happen. I never considered that before. Am I supposed to eventually figure out what to expect with the unknown, or should it remain unknown?

***

The rest of the day I was honouring my mum’s orders of cleaning my room. The moment that I stepped in through the door, she pounced on me to remind me what needs to be done, to which I responded with the standard, ‘I know,’ before rushing up stairs and disappearing into my room, shutting the door behind me.

I still have no idea why my room needs to be cleaned when I’m going to spend most of my time out of it and when I am in here, I’ll be asleep, but orders are orders and I have to obey them.

The problem, I find, is after I’ve cleaned my room. When I’ve put things away, organised things into specific groups, placed things in an easy place for next time – all of my efforts seem pointless because I forget where I put things when it comes for me to use them. My room is the way it is because I know exactly where everything is. I don’t have to spend minutes on end searching for one particular item when instead I could just pick it up wherever I left it before. Every time I clean my room, I make sure I make it as organised as possible, so that I will be able to remember exactly where I’ve put my stuff. I wish it was that simple.

OK, I will admit my clothes do need to be picked up from the floor. I have tripped over my shirts a few times. I keep telling myself that I’ll pick them up, but I never do until ordered to.

‘Well, why didn’t you try and keep it clean, then,’ is what my mum says after I’ve completed the task and expressed that I couldn’t be more bored. ‘If you had kept it clean, then you wouldn’t have had to clean it.’ I guess it does make sense, but again, I have to counter with the fact that I know where everything is. It’s my own system.

This time however, I haven’t once felt bored. I’m still thinking about the events that happened earlier. A lot did happen, and I know that it is going to take a while before I can fully understand it all. I just know without having to figure it out that I’m not going to find out everything I want by the end of today, let alone for a while, but I can at least try and get things organised. It would be nice if I could.

Today has been an eye opener. Yesterday, I wanted to climb into one of those pods and play against someone. Yesterday feels so long ago.

I thought about tomorrow being the unknown, even when you know what’s going to happen. Yesterday, you knew what happened. You can look back on yesterday and see what is different in today. I can now ask myself, what has happened yesterday that made today’s events happen the way they have.

Yesterday, I expressed how I really wanted to have a game in one of those pods, and I put across what my mum said was a mature argument, but she remained rigid and didn’t say yes. Today, for some unknown reason, my dad said yes and allowed me to have a game. Today, I learnt so much. How will today affect tomorrow? Today will be yesterday, and tomorrow will be today. Today will influence tomorrow even though we have no idea what’s going to happen. I didn’t know that my dad was going to say yes, even though the conversation I had with my mum must have influenced him saying so. It’s confusing, but I think I can understand it. It’s mind-blowing.

It’s like what he said in that other world, ‘So much knowledge can be learnt in just one day, it’s almost impossible to know how much can be learnt in a year.’

I’ve only just realised that I never did ask his name. We’re still strangers to each other, yet he has helped me open my eyes. That feels like it requires an entire new set of thoughts to fully understand that. I’ve never had so many thoughts fly around my head at once. It’s starting to ache.

‘WHAT‽’ mum yelled from downstairs suddenly, making me jump. I looked up and stared at the door as if it would help me listen to what’s going on better. My mum was saying something else, but I couldn’t make out what, so I put my figurines down and made my way towards the door where I opened it slowly and slightly, just so that I won’t get myself noticed.

‘WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU ALLOWED HIM IN ONE OF THOSE PODS‽’ mum yelled. ‘I SPECIFICALLY TOLD HIM NOT TO BECAUSE HE’S TOO YOUNG. WHY DID YOU DECIDE THAT GOING AGAINST MY WORD WOULD MAKE THINGS BETTER? I ALLOWED HIM GTA BECAUSE WE WERE ABLE TO COMPROMISE, THAT DOESN’T MEAN YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANT.’ I’ve never heard my mum so angry before. The doorframe that I was leaning against actually vibrated.

‘You know what he’s like,’ dad shouted back just to get his side of the argument in, ‘he won’t shut up about it otherwise.’

‘HE DOESN’T SHUT UP ABOUT IT BECAUSE HE KNOWS THAT YOU WILL CAVE AND LET HIM DO IT,’ mum yelled back. Am I like that? I like to think that I’m putting forward more of my side of the argument instead of anything else, though.

‘I let him have a go because I knew he wouldn’t want to go back. He was silent all the way home. He learnt a valuable lesson today,’ dad defended himself. That’s right, I have learnt a lot today.

‘WELL, IN THAT CASE, WHY DON’T WE LET HIM GAMBLE AS WELL,’ mum yelled back. Why would I want to gamble? ‘DO YOU THINK HE’LL LEARN SOMETHING WHEN HE’S GAMBLED OUR LIFE SAVINGS AWAY?’ the doorframe vibrated more than ever.

‘If you let me explain,’ dad said as calmly as possible.’

‘WHAT IS THERE TO EXPLAIN,’ mum couldn’t stop yelling – she was too mad – the doorframe told me that. ‘I TOLD HIM NO, AND YOU SAID YES. WHAT ON EARTH DO YOU THINK THAT IS GOING TO TELL HIM‽ I HAVE HAD IT UP TO HERE WITH YOU CONSTANTLY THINKING YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH WHATEVER YOU WANT. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!’ What’s going to happen?

Silence. No one spoke a word, but even if they did, I couldn’t hear them anymore. Heavy footsteps ran up the stairs and mum appeared on the landing. She was too mad to notice me peeking out – I don’t know what she would have said if she caught me here. She practically kicked her bedroom door open and slammed it shut, creating a booming echo throughout the house. What’s happening? I’m fearing the worst.

Minutes went by with no activity. I had better get back to cleaning my room otherwise I’m going to get yelled at for not completing it by the end of the day. I was sitting on my bed when my parent’s bedroom door opened. I jumped off my bed, but I was too slow. My mum was already half way down the stairs when I reached the door. I was expecting the argument to resume, but it didn’t. Instead, the front door opened and was slammed shut. What just happened?

THE END

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)