Film of the Week: Happy Death Day 2U

The first was not only genre bending, but also time bending. It was funny, scary, and just complicated enough to be engrossed by its mystery. It sparked many theories as to why the time looped happened; the strongest of which stated the spirit of her mother trapped Tree into a time loop to save her daughter from being murdered on her birthday, which also was the day when Tree’s mother passed away. That theory, whilst wasn’t at all proven in the film, helped better flesh out our viewing experience.

Happy Death Day 2U was said to actually explain how she ended up in the time loop. With the first being a perfect balance between horror and satire, we were looking forward to seeing Tree’s journey continue. It turns out that it wasn’t her mother’s spiritual influence, but instead a scientific fluke. There was a part of all of us which hoped this to be the case, where Tree’s mother was responsible for saving her, but the fight continues and there’s only so much power her mother can provide. The first film practically offered that theory to us – we could dive deep into the film and point out moments where we believed her mother was directly responsible for starting the time loop. We, the audience, simultaneously wrote the extended lore of Happy Death Day, and now we finally get to see the lore continued - that theory come true. We were all wrong. Her mother was not responsible for any of the events, but instead a machine which didn’t do what was intended. I was caught between two trains of thoughts.

The disappointment of her mother’s lack of influence was mentioned in the film. Tree believed that her mother saved Tree from being murdered on her birthday, the same day her mother passed away. I was just as disappointed as Tree was because it would have been so beautifully poetic, but instead we get what can essentially be boiled down to as a failed science experiment – the cause of which most stories revolved around, and is essentially frowned upon as a cliché. “But that doesn’t make it mean any less, does it?”, Tree’s boyfriend asks, to which she responds with, “I guess not.”

We were all caught up with the belief it would be some cosmic reason, and can even point out moments which we can explain as blatant clues, for the sequel to turn all of that on its head, and for the main character to mention the same disappointment as we have only but cements the true nature of both films. By looking deep into the film and examining each frame and coming up with our own theories, we unintentionally strayed away from what the film was all about. Yes, it would have been poetic and we probably would feel quite a lot of satisfaction if confirmed in the sequel, but it wasn’t. Happy Death Day was meant to be different from “a time loop film”, “a horror film”, or “a satire, romantic film”. It was meant to be different by combining all three genres into one film and making it work, and how they made it work was rather genius. They the tree basic forms of all three genres and instead of tweaking them in some way, they literally just pushed them together. It isn’t just one of the basics, it’s all of them, and because it’s got all three elements bouncing off each other in perfect sync; we’re so used to looking into the finer details, we saw exactly what we wanted to see, not what was actually there.

Happy Death Day took the clichéd form of a time loop movie, a horror movie, a satire, romantic movie, and put all those clichés together to create something different. We didn’t see that, but instead more than what was intended, and therefore we were disappointed when the sequel came around. The sequel followed the same formulas, but added the basic, cliché science element into it – a scientific fluke. Making the character aware of this further enforces what the two films are truly about.

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)

Mum's Monday: American Made

WARNING SPOILERS

Based on a true story this film starts off as a modern Universal feature, to quickly becoming a past version, in keeping with the era this film/story is set, 1978 onwards. It is a clever idea.

All off a sudden Barry Seal (Tom Cruise) leaps before he looks and the film really gets going.

The parts where Barry is talking on a screen to camera helps tell the story the film is based on and works well. The cartoon graphics also help makes you understand the geography and gives a light-hearted insight into all of it.

There is a lot of references to organisations with letters, with TWA, RAC, and CIA. They are used so much that it is noticeable in the script, but as this is what happened, these all have to be included.

It has now jumped to 1980 and it seems when you have a problem with exports into the USA, you offer 2000 Dollars a kilo. Barry sees Dollar signs, what he doesn’t see is a long runway. It is Barry’s problem. These become edge of your seat scenes and those poor trees.

In another scene where Barry continues to talk to camera and it looks like things are about to change.

Barry now owns his own airport in a quiet rundown town, I can see why they ended up where they did, an airport and 2000 acres can be very useful.

In one part, yes Barry keep doing what you do best, keep delivering, simple really.

Poor Bob, not much is known about Bob, this shows there are some amusing scenes in this film.

With 2000 acres it is just crying out to become a training ground and is ripe for expansion. What a great use of the space.

It is not surprising how money can transform a small rundown town.

It is now 1982 and Barry is on the up and up and up and up. this film is a good example of yes you can have too much money.

Now we see Lucy Seal’s (Sarah Wright) brother JB (Caleb Landry Jones) turn up, he could also be known as the weakest link, and it is good to see that despite how much money you have stealing is still frowned upon, proving it is still wrong.

It is also worth noting that a lot of money in one place can raise suspicion.

It is good to see Barry obey the ‘Land Immediately’ order, the residents on the street might not think so. When you fly as much as Barry, landing in an unusual place seems inevitable.

Just when you think you have finished with all the organisations known by letters, the DEA turns up.

The sheriff continues to be suspicious, and things are about to unravel, proving there is only so far up you can go.

Now we also have the FBI and the ATF, Barry is free to go and it is amusing to see the look on Dana Sibota (Jayma Mays) face.

Now Barry is working for a higher power and sadly the photo doesn’t lie.

It is sad to see that Barry doesn’t get put somewhere safe, same place same time is a risk.

You could say this film/true story is the ultimate undercover operation of all time, but with a sad and tragic ending. We hear a reference to where Lucy had worked before, so to see her where she ends up you just know she and the kids will be ok.

The reference to her previous circumstances is a nice touch in remembrance, that is how I see the bracelet.

The Written Podcast: Not My Atmosphere

Yesterday, I was invited out for a drink with my work colleagues. I don’t drink alcohol, so I stuck with Diet Coke, which I jokingly referred to as “virgin Coke and Run on the Rocks; and Diet” which got at least a couple of chuckles, but obviously I wasn’t expecting the entire pub to be rolling around with laughter.

I’m the type of person who doesn’t do nightclubs. I tried it once before and hated it. I’ve been to a couple of concerts before, but even then I made sure to be seated on the sides not standing in the middle to watch the band playing. I don’t do dancing in a crowded room, it’s just not how I’m wired. I can sit here typing out the specifics on how my mind works and why dancing is not something I’m instantly drawn to doing the moment of stepping into a nightclub.

The gathering wouldn’t be in a nightclub, however, but instead in a pub. Well, over the past few years, I’ve developed by a staggering amount. If I were to stand next to myself from the past and compare notes, I’d certainly notice the difference in confidence. I would definitely describe myself as a completely different person compared to that of who I was only but two years ago.

I’ve not stepped foot into that atmosphere since that nightclub, and so it’s only fair that I keep my open-minded attitude and give a night out with my work colleagues – people I get along with every single day – a chance. A second chance at a night out. Because of how much I’ve changed, maybe it’ll be a different experience. Same atmosphere, different way of processing it.

As the night drew closer and it was nearing the time for me to climb into my car, I did feel a little nervous, but I didn’t let it consume me as it would have done. Before, I dreaded even the thought of stepping foot into that atmosphere, so I automatically, instantly, refused to go out. This time, I may have been nervous, but I had the power to push on forward. I had the ability to keep those nerves from getting the better of me and keep me grounded at home.

The pub was crowded from the beginning of the night, and gradually became so packed it was difficult to move properly. There were so many people, it was a complete battering against my senses. I couldn’t hear myself think. I couldn’t concentrate properly on what people were saying, on what was going on around me, I could feel myself not smiling; not enjoying the moment. It transpired that I wasn’t the only person who wished to be out of there – so we moved to a different venue.

In the second venue, the loud music was even louder, but the people were fewer, and so it was something I could see myself getting used to eventually. My work colleagues were talking about their lives and dancing to the music, and so were the strangers, of which there seemed to be more and more entering the pub. I found myself sitting at a table, not doing a thing.

I tried interacting with my colleagues. I spoke to them, but only for a minute or so before that conversation naturally died off, rendering me once again just sitting by the table, not entirely enjoying the atmosphere.

A sit down meal. A one-on-one meal. A pub where only my work colleagues were in and no strangers; where we can not only choose the music we play, but also set the volume to the level we can at least have a decent conversation with. All better nights out than where I was.  The second venue was once again just as tortuous to the senses as the first. And it didn’t take long before I had reached my limit. I snapped. I had to get out of there. I had to leave.

I didn’t want to leave because my work colleagues were happy that someone like me were out and about, and so leaving would feel like I was disappointing them. I had reached the unrelenting paradox where I wanted to leave the venue because I was too nervous to stay, but also didn’t want to leave because I was too nervous to leave. I was stuck in the middle of two mental blocks – both of which were being constantly battered by the coherent nonsense all around me.

I had learnt that, whilst I had certainly changed from who I was a couple of years ago, I hadn’t changed as much as I thought I had. At least I tried, though. At least I gave it a second chance. At least I ventured forth into the world I once hated in an attempt to make peace with it, and enjoy myself, not sit down, unmoving, with a face that was ever growing sadder and sadder with each passing song. Maybe in a couple of years’ time I’d try it again.

On Monday of this week, it turns out that I needn’t have been worried about leaving early because I wasn’t enjoying myself; they accepted it wasn’t my atmosphere. If and when they organise another night out, I probably won’t be attending, not because the night out is actually bad, but purely on the basis that it just isn’t my scene. I’d rather be sitting at home, wrapped up in my duvet, watching a good movie.

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)

Film of the Week: The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part

Making any sequel to a film is difficult work, even more so when the first was a monumental hit for all families across the world. With two spin-offs, Lego Batman and Lego Ninjago, whether we saw it or not, there was some pressure to get the sequel to the Lego Movie right enough to not dampen what had come before.

The sequel is as entertaining as the first, as well as expanding what we had before, by incorporating more of what Lego is all about. The sequel also features more of the human world than the previous, a concept that only but cameoed right at the end – as well as musical numbers, time travel elements, and a shocking twist right at the end which you certainly won’t see coming until it’s revealed. There’s a lot going on in this movie, more so than the previous, and at times wondered if there was too much for a child to follow without getting disinterested.

The truth is, no, they won’t get bored. The sequel is fun, full of funny one-liners, play on words which are emphasised by the visuals, and a story with a strong moral message throughout. Whilst the first was thought of as just a feature-length advert with a good story, this swaps that format is has a good story that is a feature-length advert, and that’s OK.

There are certain moments which needed to be refined just a little bit, just as the transitioning between the music numbers, which felt a little clunky. Once the musical numbers were in full swing, however, they were decent, toe-tapping pieces, but how they were featured along with a fourth-wall break – of which there does seem to be plenty – those moments made the overall movie not flow as smoothly as the first one did. Whilst you could technically say the human world is this film’s version of a fourth-wall break – that’s all that was needed, not any of the characters to make passing reference that they’re within a movie, because those lines felt like they could have been taken out with no ill-effect to the scene in question.

The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part doesn’t prevail over the first instalment nor The Lego Batman Movie, but it was definitely entertaining seeing certain well-known characters in situations never before seen, which provided a fresh take on those characters.

But does this review really matter? I’m an adult; I don’t even have a family. This is a family-friendly film purely created for the entertainment of your children and their parents who are dragged to the cinema. A child isn’t going to write an extensive critical analysis of the film, are they? They’re going to sit in their chairs, and be bewildered by the clear colours, epic actions scenes, dance to the musical numbers, be joyfully confused with the time travel element… or is this review needed for the adults to see if they actually want to take their child to a good film or a bad film. Well, how many poor parents had to see The Emoji Movie because their children kicked up a storm? Good or bad, parents would be watching it regardless, so I can say with confidence that The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part is entertaining to the dads who have been dragged to the cinema whilst the mum’s go shopping, or to the mums who is keeping their children entertained whilst their dad works this one-off weekend, or to both parents who thought it would be a good day out for the whole family.

There are certainly worse films you could be seeing.

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)

Mum's Monday: Chaos Bound ‘The Runelords’ by David Farland

Book one

The book starts off slow but quickly becomes a fight for survival against the water of the sea. Although this is very much a fictional/ fantasy story it is written in such a good way, that you can picture the events happening in the real world, even including when Sir Borenson turns from a man to a beast.

This story high-lights that someone can fall from being rich to no different or worse than the poor people you may look down upon. This shows you shouldn’t judge people.

The descriptions of events in this book are really well done, they are in-depth and unique. At the start of chapter two I wander where the story was going, but by the end, les just say ‘It all comes together’.

In this book it describes really well how a ‘Pony and a warhorse are much the same’, although this is very much set in a fictional world it is written in such a way that for me as the reader, I can relate events and creatures to here in the real world, this is very clever.

This story high-lights that sadly someone of a higher ranking can fall on hard times, as Sir Borenson realises, whilst talking with Baron Walkin. It is nice to see Walkin see the good in Sir Borenson for Borenson’s son Draken’s sake.  

It is sad to see this book high-light that, as in the case of Sir Borenson, that people are judged on how they look and not what is on the inside. Although Sir Borenson hasn’t been a saint, having done some very bad things, there is still good in him, in being productive in providing for his family, or at least trying to after the flood.

At the start of chapter five, humans go up against the larger Wyrmlings. Although it is good to see that sometimes speed can win against size, in this case sadly, it doesn’t all go the human’s way.

In chapter seven Sir Borenson becomes Aaath Ulber. It is a sad and tragic outcome in this chapter, but Sir Borenson was trying and sadly succeeded in protecting his family. It is sad to read about the loss of control and the Walkin’s flee, but if they don’t now feel safe, it can be their only option.

Chapter eight questions whether someone who has no control of themselves, loses control and does something terrible, can they be held responsible for their actions? As in this case there are a lot of factors involved as to who started the fight. This chapter also high-lights how children can suffer because of the actions of their parents.

This book is very well written to show life lessons in amongst all the, very much non-fictional setting. The setting is interesting and the story incorporates an in-depth look at life as a whole. I wouldn’t say ‘This book is a page turner, that you can’t put down’ you can, but when you go back to a few days later you can easily pick up the story again, I found it easier to read one chapter at a time.

In chapter nine you could say that the author has drawn research from seeing the aftermath of a natural disaster like a tsunami. The description of all the debris floating in the river is very much like of what you would see after a disaster. This has been researched really well.

Book two

In chapter thirteen it high-lights that if you really love someone you will wait for them, in all the uncertainty and it is nice to see Rain and Aaath Ulber sort out, what could be seen as their differences.

In chapter fifteen the detail in this book is done so well to even include the sound that an ice berg makes, floating in salt water.

In chapter eighteen it does make you question as to who you can trust, luckily Rain is safe.

In chapter twenty-one it is good to see strategy against might win out. However, Aaath Ulber has worked out it isn’t over yet and there is a bigger plan afoot. This part is very cleverly written to get across all the scenes played out in this book and the war scenes to come.

Parts of this book remind me of what you can find in a computer or console game, in the way the characters can enhance themselves with ‘Endowments’. This could also be seen as an upgrade that a character can gain for themselves in a game.

In chapter twenty-seven there is a very well written description of Aaath walking on water. We have all heard of walking on water, but to read a more in-depth description, the sponginess of the water, is brilliant.

In chapter twenty-eight we have all heard of people believing in ‘Life after death’ but this makes me question ‘Life after spirit’, which is another clever part.

The war, when it happens is written at a fast pace and the end of this book leaves you wanting more.

Overall, this, for me wasn’t an easy book to read, one thing that stood out the most was, there are so many characters introduced in this book, that it is hard to keep up with them all. This is also a most unusual fantasy story, cleverly written.

Film of the Week: Captain Marvel

With Avengers: Endgame looming just round the corner, Captain Marvel is introduced, adding a whole bunch of lore to the MCU. Where the space-stone (tesseract) went after Captain America: The First Avenger, and gives us knowledge we previously didn’t have before when we inevitably restart watching the MCU again either before Endgame and/or after – Captain Marvel had been in space the entire time.

This review isn’t going to be an over-analytical explanation on why she’s the strongest MCU character even when other characters have been in direct contact and have used the Infinity Stones, such as Dr. Strange with the time stone, Vision with the mind stone? I’m not going to attempt to break down who would win in a three-way fight between Dr. Strange, Vision, and Captain Marvel, because there are too many possible outcomes which could arise from such fight. Captain Marvel has shown just how powerful she can be, and the potential she has yet to unleash in this film, by destroying numerous enemy ships with ease during an epic fight in space, accompanied by a motivational, powerful score.

Captain Marvel has also brought back some characters I’d believed we never see again for various reasons, whether they’re dead, operating mainly behind the scenes, or simply no need for them to resurface to the forefront anymore. Ronan, who we saw in Guardians of the Galaxy, and in possession of the power stone, and was subsequently overpowered by said stone. Phi Coulson, who’s been roaming around in complete secrecy since the events of the first Avengers movie, a feat I somehow have yet to truly believe isn’t entirely possible without at least one of the Avengers finding out about him still being alive after 7 years, but again this isn’t an over-analytical article, but instead a simple review of the film, Captain Marvel. The technology used to de-age both Clark and Samuel L. Jackson was flawless. I couldn’t see any moments where the seams didn’t quite stay attached. The special effects team did more than just put a bunch of de-aging cream on the two characters though, they created the scale of what it would be like actually fighting in space, above Earth.

Watching the film in IMAX, during the climactic battle in space, there were a couple of moments where I was so engrossed with the film, there were a couple of moments were the camera points down to face Earth, and I actually felt genuinely a bit dizzy. I’ve never felt that effect during a film before – so the special effects team require a decent pat on the back for their incredible efforts throughout the film.

As for the actual writing and story – it isn’t a traditional origin story. We do learn how she attained her powers, and her backstory, but not in the usual linear way in most superhero stories. Through brief flashbacks – some of which were intentionally warped for the purpose of the story, a move not normally seen and therefore gave a unique viewing experience. We don’t see her acquire her powers until the beginning of the climactic battle of the film, via flashback, when most superheroes would gain their powers at the end of the first quarter. Although, it should be noted that those who went up to fight alongside Captain Marvel, only Nick Fury did something helpful, the other one only just stood around looking amazed, shocked, and ran away from danger. I can't remember her name, but at least she now has a good story to tell her daughter when returning home, so that's something useful - although her daughter can't really tell her friends what her mum did because she may be laughed at, but hey, this isn't an article where I over-analyse.

But mostly though, it is a classic MCU film. Filled with jokes, Easter eggs, and a Stan Lee cameo. The audience laughed at the right moments, the jokes weren’t over the top or too many, and the film answered a load of secondary questions, such as how Nick Fury lost his eye, how Coulson and Nick’s relationship grew to be as strong as it is today. With Endgame just round the corner, it’s nice to have a few things wrapped up before the era comes to an end. Captain Marvel serves as not only a look into the past, but also helping us fans move forward. It is a good, fun, entertaining film with an absolutely epic battle in space.

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)

Mum's Monday: Thunder Rock by Robert Ardrey

This book is set out as a script of a play, which is extremely well done.

Act One

It takes a certain person to be a lighthouse keeper, but I am glad that the radio still works. As much as Charleston wants to be on his own, practicalities, like restocking the Thunder Rock lighthouse with supplies is still required and inspections are necessary to check the essential lighthouse is in good working order. At the end of act one we meet one of the ghosts haunting the island.

The book is written as a play so well that you can really picture the scenes on the stage and get a full image of the characters.

Act Two

In this act we meet all the spirits, Charleston is not alone at all, the spirits are a mixed bunch which makes for realistic reading of the characters. You have the crew of the ships and then you have the passengers.

When I read about the ghosts possibly being in the mind like being a figment of the imagination. Although in this case, that may be the case but not all spirits are just in the mind.

I think it is funny that as they don’t know they are dead and they are still living in their own past life time zone and are confused when modern times, for this book, is talked about.

It is sad to read about the tragedy and this does give an insight into someone in heaven waiting for someone still on the earth, or as in this case not yet crossed over.

It is sad yet amusing to read what the spirits find out from the plague. Some other amusing parts are when Captain Joshua paces out a L shape, the reason being because he is following the path of his small bridge area on his ship back in his life.

Act Three

This gives an insight into what may happen if someone from the past turns up in modern times. I have heard of people questioning ‘What would people from another time would think of the modern world?’ Whether they would accept and embrace it or not understand or just in this case, may just cross over.

This book ends abruptly but over all this is a surprising fun read and I wouldn’t mind seeing the play acted out. However, there is a DVD film based on this book.

Film of the Week: The Cloverfield Paradox

The third film in the franchise, The Cloverfield Paradox is easily the most mind-bending, and as tradition with these films, subtly proves how it’s connected with the other two. Whether it’s through analysing the Easter eggs and references throughout or piecing together other bits of information to form your own theories, this trilogy of films is probably the most distantly related interconnected trilogy sharing the same lore and continuity.

Whilst the first was purely told via first-person perspective with found-footage, it was only but a monster movie with a lot more depth compared to others – but it had been noted it can be difficult to focus on certain points because of the extremely shaky camera, even for a found-footage film. The second told its story via third-person, and did have small hints connecting it to the first, but J.J. Abrams stressed they’re more spiritual successor to the first. It was also once a different story entirely with entitled “The Cellar”, but during production, was morphed into 10 Cloverfield Lane.

The third film followed the same production cycle as its predecessor; it wasn’t connected to the previous two in any way, but was a script about a space station crew entitled, “God Particle”. The production company, Bad Robot once again morphed the script to connect it to the Cloverfield franchise and The Cloverfield Paradox was released, featuring a space station crew, experimenting and testing a new method on how to create a sustainable infinite energy source for Earth. This experiment didn’t go as planned and they found themselves in a different universe entirely. That’s right, we’ve gone from being a found-footage monster movie to a third-person science-fiction, reality bending, universe hopping film with a psychological horror film in the middle. Three different genres of movies in the same franchise. I can’t think of any franchise that has changed its genre so radically as Cloverfield has.

You can certainly view them as separate films, but the third does show visually, a more of a connection to the first, although eagle-eyed viewers have observed the dates of the three films don’t line up with each other, prompting many fan theories and diagrams and explanation videos to spawn all across the internet, a couple of which I’ve watched and were interested in as they all generally made sense. Some points remained consistent throughout every video, but each video does end on a different theory, and that’s what makes Cloverfield an incredible franchise. To not blatantly connect them, but instead drip-feed subtle nods, giving the viewers something to get their teeth stuck into and their minds churning on the information; it’s not just an average movie-going experience, but much more of an interactive one. You can certainly just watch them without diving into the lore, or you can look further – that choice is totally up to you.

As a fan of stories featuring time travel and hopping between parallel universes, I did find this enjoyable, especially with how they represented the two universes interacting with each other, so I can admit there might be a bit of bias with this review, as it does have particular elements I do like, but as someone who does like these stories I have certainly seen plenty featuring time travel and parallel universes. I know when a film with those elements is bad and when it’s good, and I can happily say this is one of the good ones. Just because it does have two of my favourite elements in film doesn’t automatically make it a good movie; The Cloverfield Paradox is a genuinely good usage of those two factors, and is a perfect addition to the Cloverfield franchise.

I’m just intrigued with how they will inevitably continue it forward. Maybe they’ll see a script under development and turn it into the fourth film – if it worked well for the other two, then why not the next one?

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)

The Written Podcast: £X.XX + VAT

This article is going to be a rant. A classic British rant, where I complain about something that’s probably not worthy of a rant, but gets one regardless. We British likes to rant about everything and anything – we are exceptional complainers. We find the mundane, which no one else considers as anything but, worthy to get ourselves angry over. If we don’t get red in the face over a little thing which only happens once every blue moon and pitch better ideas on how it should work, then can we really call ourselves British?

The title describes how some business gives you only the first part of a price, and you’re required to perform math to get what you’re really paying for. VAT (value added tax) is added onto everything we buy here in Britain. (Other countries also have this tax and call it by a different name.) Value Added Tax is, as of writing this article, 20%, which is an increase of 2.5% since 1994 – and I dare say it’ll increase later on in the future, despite people’s protests. That 20% goes to the Government. Billions of pounds from that tax alone goes to the Government. It’s a common misconception that the name of the tax specifically relates to what the government spends the money on – that’s not the case; the government can and does spend all collected money from every tax on whatever they want. Road Tax is only named such but we shouldn’t believe all our money we give under that name only goes to the roads of Britain – but instead gets spend on whatever they want. This goes for every single tax they’ve issued – including the TV license.

Some things are exempt from the 20% increase: Children’s car seats, and home energy services, which only get 5% tax increase. Most food and children’s clothes are completely exempt from all tax increase – although the British government recently introduced the sugar tax, which sits at a moderate £0.18p for all sugary drinks per 100ml. It must be noted, we fully expected full-fat Coke and Pepsi to have their prices rise, but we are a bit confused as to why Diet drinks which heavily promote not having an ounce sugar within. There may be some explanation, but I can’t find a decent one online, not even when trying to find some official sources – but that’s a rant for another time.

The fact we have VAT doesn’t aggravate me, no; but rather how it’s presented by business. Most online business gives all their prices having first calculated the 20% increase, but some online business and most off-line business give their prices without VAT, and expect us to calculate that increase.

To explain why I’m (certainly unnecessarily) angry, some business gives you only the price not including VAT. They say, “it’s £14.00 + VAT”. OK, so now I have to add 20%. No, just give me the price including VAT. Of course I’m going to pay the 20% extra; it’s not an optional extra, so just give me the full price. I don’t expect to do maths when purchasing my car parts. Just say the price is £16.80 and let me be on my way. At my place of work, I give the full price with VAT included, and people have gotten so used to being given only a part of the full price, they have to ask if the price I gave them is including VAT. I don’t want to give in and do what I dislike, but it’s an unnecessary question. Yes, the price I’ve given them is including VAT simply because you have to pay it; it’s not a choice you can opt out of if you don’t have enough in your wallet; I’m given you the full price because after you’ve done the maths, that’s exactly what you’ll be paying. I just can’t win.

And if you’re not that good at maths – you’ll have to get out the calculator to work out the full price, or wait for the employee to work it out after having to ask them. An entire conversation and a set of actions can be saved if people only but give the full price, not a partial.

I mean, they don’t do that for anything else. You don’t ask if a film is out and the shopkeeper says “yes, + the disk.” You’d think that’d be a strange answer. I didn't ask for just the case, I asked for the whole package just as I didn't ask for part of the price, but as strange as it may seem I asked for the whole price. You don’t go to a car dealership and ask if the new car range has released and the sales adviser says, “yes, + the wheels.” You’d probably be inclined to ask for them elaborate on what the heck they meant by that. Are wheels an optional extra – no, of course the car comes with wheels so why not just say yes, the car is out. Just give us the total price, not a math test. I’m not an accountant – I’m someone who just wants to buy something – how hard can it be?

The only place where it is acceptable and should only be the place where people can say “+ something,” is at a café or restaurant. You ask, “do you have the burger?” and they say, “yes, + chips.” Except, the chips are actually an optional extra you’re not forced to take, unlike VAT.

In some situations, you do have to give the price without VAT, but usually - I've noticed - whoever is asking specifically requests that, otherwise they are expecting the full price. In trade business, they do have two separate prices - one with and the other without VAT added - due to the other business who do buy from them normally have certain discounts here and there of certain values depending on what's brought and how much, and so the baseline price without VAT is required to calculate the specific prices these other companies will be paying. That's understandable and acceptable, but even then they're not expecting the prices to be given to them in chunks, but instead the full value after the calculations have been made - not "£14 + 15% discount instead of the usual 20% VAT the general public pays". I just can't quite get my head around why some business would only give you part of a price plus a math lesson. If I have to do a math lesson, I expect the time it takes me to work out the full price to be converted into the percentage I then want taken off the full price, yes that's including VAT.

And that concludes my classic British rant. I am of course only writing this to get it off my chest. I’m not expecting miracles, nothing’s going to happen now I’ve expressed my opinion. How weird would it be if I woke up the next morning and Britain collectively felt inspired to change the way they state the prices of products? Very weird indeed, probably. No, this is just a rant about the mundane and what most people would state is pointless to even be angry about, which they’re right, which also means they don’t truly know what it is like to be British unless they’ve had a good classic rant about nothing. Once they’ve let it out of their system, they’ll understand and apologise to me for complaining about nothing… what am I even saying?

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)

Mum's Monday: The Mummy (2017)

This film is a remake of the 1999 version, that one, to me was more real, smoother in the running of it and the 2 main characters got the job done. The Mummy was a male and the character having visions of the past was female. In this, later version, we see a role reversal, The Mummy, Ahmanet (Sofia Boutella) is female and Nick Morton (Tom Cruise) seeing images of the past, is male.

The film starts, based around the London Cross Rail construction, this is a good idea, and who knows what they did find. In the film the rail got re-routed.  It makes me wander, how many more secrets, are yet to be found. It is interesting to watch and think about.

After a promising start, the film scenes, jumps to ones in the past in Egypt. This shows that it is only recently where inherited power is passed down to a female heir, unless a male child is born and, although younger, they are first in line.

Now back to the present, Nick and Sgt. Vail (Jake Johnson) are in Iraq, in the Middle East, during the conflict. The stunts in this part are well done and flows smoothly as the building separates and collapses.

The plane crash seems a bit over the top, that a plane would fly that way, after a bird strike. The scenes are a bit long-winded. The film is only just over 1 hour and 45 minutes long and it could have easily been a bit shorter, by shortening the plane crash, and taken out where Henry Jekyll (Russell Crowe), turns out to be a Jekyll and Hyde character, this is just silly and unnecessary

There is an amusing part in the morgue, it seems being cursed, can have its advantages, you may want to find clothes quickly though and despite the illusions, living is better than being dead.

Although it seems that the Mummy, spends most of the film chained up, because this is a relatively short film, compared to other action films, it is not as long as I first thought when I see it first time round, she still causes havoc and death where ever she shows up.

The special effects and the makeup are well done throughout the film.

The film shows us, that archaeology, can be dangerous, to be careful what you separate and bury in 2 different places and if you think something is safely held down, something could be invented to help bring it to the surface, in this case a soldier with a gun and a precision gun shot.

Overall I had to see this film twice before I understood it completely and compared to the 1999 one, this more modern one, seems to be trying to be more of a block-buster version.

The Written Podcast: “You Should Have Been There”

We’ve all been there; in that moment that would never be created again. Whether it was unintentionally set up via a running joke, or a series of fortunate events coinciding perfectly to create one sudden surprise. These moments are commonly shared between either two of you or as part of a group, and of course, cannot be retold to simulate the same effect.

It’s those moments we can’t help but want to tell someone who wasn’t there, so they could hear about what happened, but there’s one problem: You can’t retell it. You can attempt to spread the word, but once you’ve gotten to the punchline, you’re met with only but blank stares and/or confusion because they simply don’t understand what you’ve just said and any attempts to make them understand requires a history lesson about running jokes and these precise events. Unfortunately, giving this lesson only makes the listener bored and potentially even more confused, but which at that point the effect has worn off completely and you resort to the only sentence you can in to justify your failure at telling your story: “you should have been there.”

We’ve all either made the attempt to tell a story or have been on the receiving end of a badly told one, only to end with those famous words. It’s mainly our curiosity which drives us to make the other person tell that story, because of course you would want to know what’s making them laugh so hard the next morning. Whilst on the giving end, sometimes we’ve uttered the words before even beginning the story – some people accept that and move on, other people take the risk and push us to tell them what happened, only to end inevitably, in a mess of words and emotions, making them realise they should have moved on upon discovering this was a story they knew before being told it, wouldn’t be one they’d understand fully.

I can fill this article with a story that happened of which you definitely should have been there to appreciate why, for us two, was so funny. My eyes were streaming with tears from laughing so hard. It was one running interwoven with original jokes, allowing for each joke to have that much more impact, and the climactic ending left us both wiping our eyes. I could make the attempt to explain, but I’d have to go back a couple of years, a couple of YouTube videos, and the entire plot of a film, including our thoughts on that film. Once you’ve then understood all of them, only then can I start explaining my story which led up to that one moment. It’s not necessary to do all of that.

Those moments we tell other people they should have been there; we need to appreciate more. Those moments are drenched in history, and proves how bonded you are to your friend(s) for that one moment to make the most impact. Those moments don’t have to be full of history – the precise set of circumstances can start blooming at the beginning of an evening, whether that’ll be at a gathering at someone’s house, or at a night club, or anywhere really. But even then, a group of friends who’d only even fully understand that one moment no matter how long it took to set up, need to appreciate it more when it does.

By failing to recreate the moment for someone else through storytelling, shows us all how unique those moments really are, and how practically impossible they will be if attempted to be recreated again. Those moments are spontaneous, improvised – not maliciously planned beforehand. No one is following a written script, it’s entirely down to being within that moment, and enjoying it for the brief time it’s arrives.

With how easy it is to film everything nowadays, a lot of moments can be captured forever, and shown to whoever in the future. The next morning, at work, certain moments are passed around and viewed by many. They’ll understand what’s going on in the video, that’s for sure – whether with laughter, shock, awe, a video is able to transmit that over without having to explain it, because explaining what’s happening in the video is hard.

But, even then, there are some moments, which weren’t captured by video, and because they weren’t recorded or documented in any way other than by people’s memories, which hold the most impact. Those moments that only yourselves know and have experienced, and can revisit whenever you want via your memories – need to be appreciated more, because they are genuinely more powerful than that of a video. If the entire night was filmed, and those precise set of circumstances happened and that one moment was created, those watching would still be confused, because they wouldn’t understand the many references or the jokes – they’ll just stare blankly at the video, maybe letting out a chuckle here and there at the original jokes now and again.

Of course, even knowing how difficult it is to tell a story of that nature, you do so anyway, and even knowing it’s a story you won’t understand, you’ll ask to hear it anyway. It’s one of those mysteries we’re not going to figure out so automatically fill it under curiosity – curious as to what happened and curious at how the other person will react. That phrase, despite being said so many times over, doesn’t hold any weight, because we will only but push it to one side. Some will accept the inevitable and therefore move on, and I we’ve all been confronted with that decision, with which we’ve chosen to stand down and move on – and it’s a rare occasion.

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)