Film of the Week: Transformers – The last Knight

I’m not going to waste my time attempting to come up with some analogy, I’m going to be frank. The first 2 hours are terrible, but the last half an hour does pick up slightly. Full of nonsense one-liners that are trying to be funny, but just aren’t, annoyingly strategic camera angles so you can’t make out any details when the Autobots and Decepticons transform, and it only gets worse from there, and of course, the obligatory absence of any fleshed out plot.

The film picks up from where the fourth left off, when Optimus Prime is on a mission to find his creator and tell it to stay away from Earth. When he does find his creator, she turns him evil in an attempt to bring Cybertron, the Transformers home planet back to full strength. It’s a new angle, it’s something that the previous films haven’t done, so it was something to look forward to. Except Optimus was under the creator’s spell for about five minutes. One small battle with Bumblebee and he was back to his normal-self… well that was a wasted storyline.

Another plot point was six spikes are mysteriously popping out of the ground around the globe. No one can explain what they are, except for the creator who tells Optimus exactly what they are, or should I say, who they belong to: Unicron. I had to question what I just heard: “Are they implying Earth is Unicron?” That’s the point in the film where I legitimately sighed with disappointment. Unicron is the absolute rival of Cybertron. In the comics, he’s an extremely powerful transformer, a planet eater, a being that has been around since the beginning of the universe. The comics have written Unicron to be nearly unbeatable. The TV shows have stayed loyal to the comics, and Transformers: The Movie, complete with the booming deep voice of Orson Welles, Unicron was brought to life like nothing before could. Now, in the live-action film series, whilst not officially confirming it, but just implying that the Earth is Unicron is totally and utterly wrong and therefore unforgivable.

Since 2007, the live-action Transformers series has become somewhat a guilty pleasure for some. They know it’s bad, with nothing but fighting, but at the same time, we enjoy it. For some reason, we’re drawn to it, and therefore I can only acknowledge it as a guilty pleasure. The Last Knight has tipped the series over the edge for me, sunk as low as it could possibly go before the sixth one eventually comes out. Even implying Unicron is Earth butchers that of the everything the comics have built, everything the TV shows have loyally represented.

I am angry. I don’t care if I’m coming across as a fan-boy yelling at a live-action film series about a set of toys, I am angry that they would even consider the idea of Earth being Unicron, let alone actually implant it as part of the continuity, suggesting that Earth has been Unicron since the very beginning of the film-series way back in 2007. I understand it’s an adaptation, and so changes must be made to accommodate that otherwise it wouldn’t be original enough, but the previous four films have done that – not as well as I would’ve liked, but compared to this film, they are good adaptations – and so all this film needed to do was follow the previous four film’s examples, not scrap the very bottom of the barrel. I can only imagine how disastrous the sixth film will be after this considering it probably will pick up straight after the events of this film. It just wouldn’t make any sense if Earth actually transformed into the gigantic robot that is Unicron, because if that’s where they’re going with this, it just wouldn’t make any sense whatsoever, surely?

Can I say one good thing about this film? Well, the final battle was alright. The CGI wasn’t that bad. The shot where we saw Cybertron come in contact with the moon from Earth was an epic sight to see. That’s pretty much it – that’s all the good points I can squeeze from this disaster of a film.

I personally consider the live-action reboot of Power Rangers to be better than this, and all that film did was spend the first hour doing absolutely nothing, with a poor episode of Power Rangers afterwards for the last half hour. I felt bored watching that film, yet I consider it much better than Transformers: The Last Knight. The only reason why I didn’t do Power Rangers as the main film this week was because I have to ventilate my anger somewhere.

Sorry for the angry rant

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)

The Watch – Part 186 and Part 187:

Stepping outside, the fresh air hugged me and the bright sunlight snuggled up to me.

‘Morning, Sebastian,’ I heard Jake’s voice say beside me. I turn around and see him standing in his front garden with four suitcases in toe. He must have noticed my disconnected look for he asked if I was OK.

‘Um… Yeah, I’m OK,’ I said. I must have sounded as if I wasn’t telling the truth, and to be honest, I’m struggling to figure that out myself.

‘You look tired,’ Jake noticed. ‘Are you sure you’re alright? Nothing’s gotten you down or anything has it,’ he said sympathetically.

‘No, I’ve just been staying up later than I normally do, that’s all. You know how it is when the summer holidays get here,’ I said trying to sound as convincing as possible whilst in reality I really was tired.

‘How was your holiday?’ I asked in an attempt to change the subject. I knew that he said that he was going away, hence the suitcases, but I couldn’t remember where he went.’

‘Oh, Paris was awesome,’ he said studying that question. Is he thinking that it’s unlike me to forget something like him going away to Paris for so many days, because he would be right? ‘Me and friends just had a relaxing time of it really. We didn’t want to do anything wild, so we just sat on the balcony with our feet up. Hey, that’s a nice watch,’ he said suddenly.

‘Oh, yeah,’ I said raising it up so he can get a better look at it. Now that he’s seen it, then there’s no point in trying to hide it – as if I was trying to hide in the first place. ‘I got this on the last day of school,’ I explained.

‘Oh, yeah, now I remember. So that’s what he was delivering.’

‘What?’ I said, my eyes widening, ‘who delivered it?’

Jake looked at me curiously.

‘How come you don’t know who gave it to you?’ he asked. Oh, heck. Now I’ve gone and done it. How do I get out of this one? I need to come up with a suitable excuse but my tired brain isn’t in the mood to think fast.

‘Oh, um… I…’

‘Are you alright?’ Jake asked again. My eyesight was going fuzzy. The last thing I remember before everything went dark was my knees giving way and smashing against the ground as I feel unconscious.

***

‘I need to save them.’ I sat bolt upright.

‘Easy,’ Jake said sitting beside me. I was laying on my sofa. Jake was sitting on one of the chairs from the dining room table with his mobile phone beside him.

‘What happened?’ I asked.

‘You fell unconscious,’ Jake explained, placing his hands on my shoulder in an attempt to get me to lay back down. ‘I rushed right over and picked you up. You know, you may not look it, but you’re heavier than you look,’ he joked.

‘Why did I fall unconscious?’ I unintentionally asked out loud.

‘Only you can tell me that,’ he answered truthfully. I asked if there were any long-time side effects, not short-time side effects when Interface was explaining everything to me. Well now I don’t have to as I now know what they are. Extreme tiredness that leads to falling unconscious. Any more that I need to know. Well, I can’t find out as that would be giving showing Jake, and I don’t want any more people besides Amy, Tom and Alex to know my secret. Oh, yeah, I almost forgot that Alex knows my secret. That’s not really that important. I have no idea why I brought that up.

‘Anyway,’ Jake continued, ‘I brought you in here and that’s where you’ve been laying for ten minutes. Don’t worry, I’ve phoned for the ambulance. They’re on their way and will be here in about twenty minutes, which is quite a long time considering the hospital is…’

‘You did what?’ I said resuming my upright position.

‘Easy,’ he said again, repeating his action of trying to get me back down.

‘Why did you phone the ambulance?’ I said.

‘Why do you think? Why? What’s wrong?’

‘Nothing,’ I said quickly knowing that the can of worms is now already open and trying to get all of the worms back in the can would be very hard indeed.

‘Well, it has to be something, otherwise you wouldn’t have freaked out. Now, I’ve also phoned your parents – it went straight to voicemail, mind – and so I’ve left a message stating that it is urgent.’

‘What?’ I said sitting bolt upright for the third time. This time, Jake didn’t bother trying to push me back down. This is all that I need. Things have gotten way out of control. I was expecting a casual walk down the road, not this. Why did this have to happen?

‘What about your luggage?’ I asked, ‘you can’t leave them outside. They may get taken.’

‘Don’t worry about that,’ he said, ‘after I made sure you were settled, I brought my suitcases in and stood them in the hallway, but let’s not talk about my luggage at the minute, there’s something I need you to explain to me.’ I know where this is going. I don’t see a way out of this except by telling the truth. I don’t want to tell the truth. I know Jake is my neighbour, and a close one at that. He’s been there for me whenever I needed company. He’s an awesome person to talk to, but… Does all of that deserve to be told everything?’

‘Call off the ambulance,’ I said, ‘then I’ll explain the truth,’ I said.

‘I can’t just call off the ambulance,’ Jake said matter-of-factly, ‘and what can be so important, so secretive that you need me to do so anyway. You can tell me before the ambulance arrives.’

‘No,’ I said with finality. I don’t want the paramedics here either. That’s the dilemma that I’m face with. If the paramedics come here, they can do all sorts of tests and they might stumble across that chemical. I know Interface said that it’s now out of my system, but I just don’t want to risk it. And I don’t want to tell Jake everything either. But, comparing the two, telling Jake everything is so much better than the paramedics stumbling upon an unknown chemical in my body. Who knows what that will lead to next?

There has to be a third option. I just need to find it.

TO BE CONTINUED…

The Watch – Part 187:

‘Who do you have to save, by the way,’ Jake said casually.

I would rather be anywhere but here. All I have to do is teleport. But where to. Does it matter? All I want to do is clear my head and get rid of these short-term effects. I haven’t been able to think straight ever since the concert. Those were the days. Amy and Tom by my side, dancing all day long, listening to some truly inspirational music.

What I would give to be with Amy and Tom right now. Amy’s rational thinking with Tom’s quirky mannerisms never fails to help me out of any difficult situation. The complicated thing is, Amy and Tom are actually here. I remember saving the world from the meteorites, finding them gone, going back in time and bringing them back here, only for me to feel guilty for leaving them there, captured. Amy understood what I meant and said that it was Ok for me to go back and save them. It was a weird moment that I never actually believed would happen, yet did. Time travel can be really complicated if you let it become so.

I need help to figure this out, and there’s only one person who I trust can help me more than anyone else, and that’s Amy.

That’s it. I know where I can go. The very first parallel universe that I went to when I got the watch. I can go back there. I can recover and get my head straight. I can ask for Amy’s help and we can both discuss how best to get out of this sticky situation.

‘You’re going to like this part,’ I said to Jake. I didn’t care that I was revealing something huge right in front of his eyes. I doubt I would be coming back here in the first place. He may be questioning what just happened for a very long time, but I have to do what is necessary to get myself back on track so that I can save my friends.

‘What am I going to like?’ Jake asked.

‘This watch, it can do so much more than just tell the time,’ I said, reaching for it and searching through the menus, finding what I need. I don’t know how far back the history goes and I’ve done a lot since I went there.

‘Interface,’ I called, ‘take me to the first parallel universe that I went to, please,’ I said hoping that is all the information that he needs. Jake’s face twisted into an incomprehensible look.

‘I don’t understand,’ he said.

‘Don’t say that,’ I said. I’ve had enough of those words to last a life time.

‘Don’t say what?’

‘Just don’t say those words,’ I said.

‘Did you just say parallel world. What is that watch?’

‘Sorry about this,’ I said. I’m never going to know what his reaction to all of this is going to be like. All I can guess is that he will be very surprised, shocked, dumbfounded, probably among other things as well.

And then I disappeared back into the Void. The same spectacular light show with the twirling galaxies met my eyes as I was transported from one universe to another, re-emerging in an identical-looking living room into this.

‘Oh, hello,’ Amy’s beautiful voice said a little surprised that I had showed up suddenly. That trip had taken its toll. In any other situation, I wouldn’t have felt the effects of my body being disintegrated and rebuilt whilst going through the Void, but since I have been considerably weakened, I felt the effects much the same as I did the very first time I travelled here.

‘Are you alright?’ Amy asked.

‘No,’ I said. The last thing I want to do is hide the truth from the one person who can help me.

‘What’s wrong?’ she asked. I didn’t get the chance to answer. My body has been through so much; it’s hit its breaking point once more. I just haven’t rested enough to let it recover, and because of that, I passed out once more. I’m getting tired of getting tired.

*** 

I opened my eyes, slowly.

‘Hey, you,’ Amy said, smiling ‘long time no see.’ The entire room lit up.

‘Sorry it’s been a while,’ I said.

‘No need to apologise,’ she said, ‘from the looks of it, you’ve got a pretty busy life.’

‘Busy isn’t the right word for it,’ I said, lifting up my head at the smell of delicious toast and apple juice.

‘Well, I thought that I would give you something to eat and drink when you wake,’ she said. ‘Although, now that I think about it, toast isn’t probably the best as it may have gone cold,’ she said. I couldn’t help but chuckle. I was feeling better already. I hadn’t thought about food or drink until I saw them beside me. My stomach grumbled loudly. I leant over and grabbed the plate and glass and started shovelling the food down as if I hadn’t eaten in weeks, which may actually be the case for all I know.

‘Woah, steady on there,’ Amy said, ‘you’ll give yourself indigestion.’

‘I wouldn’t find feeling something different,’ I said, swallowing my last bite of toast and downing the entire glass of apple juice in one go. It has never tasted better. I burped.

‘Lovely,’ Amy said sarcastically.

‘Sorry,’ I said.

‘So what happened to make you collapse beside me, then?’ Amy asked curiously, before realising that it might not have been the best time to ask.

‘Actually, I’ve been waiting for a way to bring this up.’

‘Oh,’ Amy said even more curiously.

‘I need your help, but before you can do so, if you want to that is, I need to explain what happened.’

I started explaining everything that happened. The moment that I started, I couldn’t stop, and Amy didn’t stop me. She listened intently, gasping in all the right locations and wincing at the worst parts near the end. Now that I was able to get all of this off my chest, I felt so much better. Relaxed and able to think clearer.

‘Bloody hell,’ she said once I had finished.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Mum's Monday: Kat and Alfie: Redwater

Warning spoilers

Kat (Jessie Wallace) and Alfie Moon (Shane Richie) meet in the Soap EastEnders. Kat knows she has a daughter Zoe (Michelle Ryan). Stemming from one the most memorable moments in EastEnders, where Kat and Zoe were having an argument in the middle of the square and Zoe proclaims ‘You’re not my mother’ Kat yells back ‘Yes I am!’ Kat was an abused child by her uncle, who was bought up by Kat’s Parents, but what she didn’t know was that she had actually had twins. There is her son, who was taken away from her while she was unconscious, after having them.

Kat finds out that the baby boy was taken to an Irish village called Redwater, and after she and Alfie win some lottery money, they make their way there. The series works as a spin off and as a standalone but just a few things need to be explained a bit more if someone is watching it as one off series. Like Alfie’s condition and that Kat and Alfie has had a set of twins and they are being looked after in Spain. The fact that Kat has since had twins makes it believable that she had had the twins when she was a child herself.

I had high hopes for this series and the quality didn’t disappoint and it is done so well that Kat and Alfie are not actually the main characters. They arrive in Redwater with Tommy (Henry Proctor) Kat’s son, Alfie’s step son. Throughout the series, Kat and Alfie stay in character as they were in Albert Square, slotting in with the residents of Redwater.

We are all led to believe one thing, but I guessed who was her actual son. The end of the first episode was surprising and not in a good way. I felt it had let the episode down, but I gave it a chance and watched all 6 episodes and could see where it led. I can now see where the death of Lance (Ian McElhinney) had to happen, for where the story leads to.

The second episode again was realistic with ‘out of the mouths of children’ moment, when Tommy said he was digging a grave when digging in the sand.

We also have disagreements in families even small things like keeping a window open so the ‘spirit can rise’. How families humouring one another’s ways. Eileen (Angeline Ball) arrives from America for the funeral and shows when you have been out in the world, to come back is a strange experience. The script is written brilliantly. It shows how travel can broaden the mind and the down side, that they think they are better than everyone they left behind.

At the wake the quality of the singing performed by Adeen (Ebony O’Toole-Acheampong) with the ghost of Lance was a lovely touch. Despite the beautiful scenery it is not far different from Albert Square. An inter-connected community and how one person, Eileen can impact on it. I thought the ending of the second episode was a bit quick but with 4 more episodes to come we see that they had a lot to fit in.

The 3^rd episode starts off brilliantly, with Kat questioning whether she should protect her newly found son, Dermott (Oisin Stack) and not telling him about his father being a predator or tell him the truth. This is done by Kat talking over a scene where a bird catches a fish. This is a fantastic idea and adds to the quality of the series.

With quality comes normal behaviour, which is well done. We have Adeen who is a vegetarian at a barbeque, where they don’t understand so only have meat and nothing for her. The genius comes when she orders herself a pizza. It shows what we can achieve nowadays with a smart phone. Another piece of normal attitude Bernie (Susan Ateh) one of the local police officers is pregnant again so her husband Andrew (Peter Campion) instead of being as supportive as he should be just saying that she has done it before, basically she is fine. Unfortunately, this in some cases, is realistic behaviour.

We also see family dynamics go awry when Eileen announces she wants to stay and not go back to America. the up side they don’t have to sell an old family house.

In the 4^th episode we see Roisin (Maria Doyle Kennedy), Eileen’s sister who has kept the farm running and done most of the work on it over the years clash with Eileen, who has fresh ideas for the old wreak of the old farm house. I didn’t like the comment “Some of us have actual work to do” from Eileen, that was a bit unfair but if you have had no money, then taking a risk, to Roisin, can seem daunting.

In this episode we see growing suspense and when Bernie goes into labour, we see her put her faith in the wrong person, Dermott. One of the things this highlights is, if you say you have tried to call someone, there would be a missed call text, and there wasn’t. He does however, find the time to delete evidence or has he completely?

We see a twist in this episode where someone else turns up and not who we think. Peter (Stanley Townsend) is seeing someone, an affair, but not who we first thought. These episodes set up more and more so you want to watch the next to see what happens.

Before I move on to the next episode, there was another good line ‘Only person stopping you is yourself’. I can relate to that: how many times have I or anyone else talked your/our way out of something?

In the 5^th episode we see some more excellent script writing with the line “Hostile takeover by an American company” meaning Eileen and her ideas. I thought this was the best line of the series. Very relevant and amusing. In this episode we see Agnes (Fionnula Flanagan) being spiteful and evil, calling Bernie who has just had her baby fat. Sadly, there are people who are like that, but it is not very nice to watch.

Bernie and Andrew have asked Eileen and not Roisin to be one of the God-parents to their new baby. This I feel is unfair, Roisin has worked hard over the years on the farm and like many in her situation they unfortunately get over-looked.

Agnes is her usual self, when she hears that the lady who is making the christening cake has just lost her husband, it makes no difference she still sends people to get the cake. Bernie does try and stand up for herself against Agnes but fails. How far do you push it in life, a woman has lost her husband but a christening still needs a cake? I suppose it depends on the people involved, because when Andrew and Kieran (Ian Toner) arrive to collect the cake, the lady guessed it was Agnes’s doing. I didn’t feel so bad then, watching it. If it is set up so a person knows what another person is like, although they get away with it, it is seemingly to be expected.

In this episode Peter finds out that when his late wife went to London to have her baby, she lost it and then bought back Dermott, one of Kats twins. He was kept in the dark until Dermott tells him. Proving you can’t keep secrets forever.

Bernie is on maternity leave but this doesn’t mean she is inactive. She senses there is something wrong about how Lance died. This is realistic, once a police officer always a police officer. Luckily when you delete something it is not completely deleted it goes into a deleted folder and this is where vital evidence was found, after Dermott thought it was gone for good.

Agnes is still horrible and controlling, but so often can happen. Someone only has to say something or in this case Dermott preaching his sermon, and this is enough to make Agnes feel uncomfortable. It seems we all have a weak spot.

Another surprise twist shows up in this episode. We have Andrew and Kieran, they are cousins. They kiss, now Andrew says he was tricked or was he? I felt sad for them especially Andrew and his family. As so often happens people go along with what is expected of them, marriage and kids. If he is truly Gay, then it is his family that stand to get hurt the most. It is sad to think people’s principals come before people’s true feelings.

Alfie’s condition is more explained in this episode how his growth in his brain is affecting him. How the episode’s work is the story lines all slot in and others need to bide their time before they are revealed more. This system works well and adds to the quality.

Another issue that comes to light in this episode is Roisin and Padraig (Stephan Hogan) are having marital problems. Eileen tries to give Roisin advice, but we have to remember no one knows what goes on behind closed doors. How well meaning the advice is?

The 6^th and final episode of the first series. Bernie is getting close to solving what happened to Lance. Yet again Roisin is overlooked but she is clearly local so more knowledgeable. Someone always sees something or heard something. The truth comes out with Peter and Agnes is milking it. She is angry and bitter. Kieran says he is going back to America, that is for the best. Alfie is in hospital having an operation on his growth in the brain. Kat is with Dermott after a boat accident. We see the suspense build and build…and then it ends.

Some excellent cliff-hangers I hope there is another series and many more.

The characters are believable. The situations they find themselves are real and the quality hardly dipped throughout. Well done on this Eastenders spin off.

Jerry's Journal: What's That Creature?

Yesterday I was away from my computer all day, but I had The Watch - Part 186 scheduled and ready to go up at the usual time of 12:00PM. Unfortunately, due to an unforeseen technical glitch, the article never uploaded and I only found out about that when I returned lat at night. To make up for that error, on Tuesday, I will be releasing two parts in one.

On Monday, Jerry went over my Grandma's with mum and went for a walk around the area. During the walk, he saw something he's never seen before: A horse. He looks rather interested as he tries to figure out what he's actually seeing. 

Thanks for reading
Antony Hudson
(TonyHadNouns)

Random Topic Generator: Why I don’t like following Yu-Gi-Oh’s Banned List

Yu-Gi-Oh Trading Card Game has been around since 1996. 1,000s of cards have been released since, changing the game considerably, sometimes forcibly evolving the game to keep it fresh and entertaining. With each new Anime, a new type of card is released, bringing a new aspect to the game. I have been playing the card game for a number of years and have seen the game develop considerably, from when it was predominately normal monsters to having practically nothing but effect monsters, with new mechanics.

Each year, a number of official tournaments have a run, where people can go and play the game with the hopes of winning. It quickly became apparent that some people were dominating the game via the use of specific cards so they created the banned/limited list. A list of cards that are illegal in official tournament play or are limited, so instead of having three copies of a certain card, you are only allowed 2 copies or just the 1 copy. The list was created with the intention of creating balance. With these overpowered cards removed from the tournament, no one can storm through too easily, making it unfair for everyone else.

The list constantly changes, too. A new updated list is released about 2-3 times a year, which explains which cards have left the list and what new cards have been put on there. There are some cards that have a permanent position on the list, purely because they do give the player too much of an advantage, but with the introduction of new mechanics, many have left to accommodate to keep the game as balanced as possible.

However, I like to be awkward and go against the list. I dislike following it and put a few banned cards in my decks, and here’s why.

My main reason is it’s a lot more fun. If your opponent allows the use of banned cards in the duel, or wishes to use them in their decks, the game can be much better. It’s understandable that if someone uses a banned card at the right time, it can be very annoying to the opposing person, but in casual play, where anything goes, it does allow for an entertaining duel.

The game has started to lose a part of it that I thoroughly enjoyed, and that’s “one card can change the entire game”. You can argue there are many cards that aren’t banned and changes the game drastically and immediately. A single duel could have multiple twists and turns, where one turn you’re in the lead, the next your opponent is, and then the very next turn you’ve taken back your lead. It has that “it’s everyone’s game” vibe. Unfortunately, nowadays, it’s hard to incorporate those cards in a deck. If you are to stand a change in tournaments, or against anyone really, you need to build a deck around an archetype. Your opponent’s deck will work fluidly, but it will completely destroy yours. I like using a deck with a bunch of random cards put together because it gives me a challenge - I'm forced to use my imagination to formulate a strategy, which in turn creates a unique game. I'm allowed to take risks and learn from my mistakes. If I'm following an archetype and I make a mistake, I may have completely compromised my entire deck and therefore the duel. Yu-Gi-Oh has pushed archetypes to the centre of the game, which, if I'm completely honest, gets a bit boring after a while.

But please don’t take me the wrong way, I have nothing against making a deck based around a specific archetype, or strategically combining two together. You could do that back when I started playing the game, but the game also had a sense of randomness as well. A couple of years ago, it was possible to put your favourite cards in a deck and give your opponents a run for their money, even if they were following a specific archetype. Nowadays, people only ever focus on specific archetypes, slowly eliminating that sense of creativity I enjoyed and was the reason I started playing the game. If I were to take a deck filled with my favourite cards into an official tournament – following the banned list of course – I would probably be out during the first round. The only way you can stand some chance is to incorporate banned cards, but you then won’t be allowed to play in the tournament. If you were allowed to play with those banned cards, it would be possible to completely destroy a deck centred around an archetype, and you would be criticised for it.

Another criticism I’m constantly getting is “you won because you were using banned cards”. Well, there is a small sense of truth in that statement, because according to the official tournament rules, they are banned, but there’s also that sense of, “I won because I got lucky”. I’m compiling my deck with what is now seen as a bunch of random cards that won’t work together, unlike an archetype that constantly works as a team every single duel. Sometimes, people forget that the game is centred around luck. The luck of the draw can determine how the duel plays out. You have a card in your deck that can put back in the lead, but you need to draw it. If you don’t, fair enough; if you do, you got lucky, that’s how it works. However, with the increasing popularity of archetypes, the deck works so fluidly, a person can have a winning streak, before luck kicks back and they lose, and then criticise you for winning because you were using banned cards despite that they’ve won four times in a row. With my deck of random cards compiled together, whilst luck plays a bigger role, there’s also a higher chance of having the ability to do at least one thing a turn, whereas if you pull the wrong card in the archetype deck, you can’t do a thing until you do draw that one card, allowing the random deck that “shouldn’t work” take the lead.

My last reason why I dislike the banned list is because there are plenty of completely legal cards that are considerably more powerful than some of the cards on the list. That doesn’t make any sense. Magic Cylinder, for example, is a trap card that can be activated when your opponent attacks either your monster or you directly; it negates the attack and inflicts damage to their Life Points equal to the monster’s attack – which can grant you an automatic victory. That’s completely legal meaning you are allowed the maximum of three copies in your deck. Magic Cylinder is actually pretty tame compared to many other legal cards, which begs the question of why those cards on the banned list are there in the first place. Surely it should be the other way round? Konami created the list to ensure balance in the game, but the game is currently as balanced as an elephant and a feather being weighed and the scales say they weigh the same.

To bring at least some balance to the game, I believe Konami needs to cancel the banned list, and or think up a better one entirely.

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)

1,000 Words: London Trip #2

Yesterday I went to London to the Palace Theatre to watch Harry Potter and the Cursed Child. I know it has been nearly a year since it first opened, so I'll instead show you a few pictures that I took between parts 1 and 2 of the surrounding area.

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)

Film of the Week: The Mummy (2017)

I prefer The Mummy (1999)

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)

OK, I need to explain myself, don’t I?

There is one definite thing this new mummy film has done better than the ones before it; the CGI. The Mummy Returns had dreadful effects that were clearly dated even back when it was released. However, the story isn’t as strong as The Mummy (1999)

This is the first film in Universal’s attempt to make an interconnecting franchise with various characters, known as the Dark Universe. An interesting idea that when I first heard about it, does, in theory, work. Seeing a number of iconic monsters on screen together, along with other famous characters, would be an entertaining experience, and most definitely be the first of its kind.

Establishing this universe does seem a daunting thing to put on the shoulders of this first film, and it unfortunately doesn’t carry it as well as it could have done. It throws the story around so much, it’s sometimes hard to keep up with what’s going on, and at times, doesn’t actually feel like a mummy film at all. All the elements are there to set up future films, get the characters ready for further development, create that core we can all revolve around, but it doesn’t utilise them well.

The reason why I said I prefer The Mummy that came out in 1999, is because it focuses on the mummy only. Its three-part formula is: They find and accidentally release the mummy, which begins wreaking havoc on the world, and then is defeated by the main characters. In the 2017 version of the film, the find and accidentally release the mummy, which begins wreaking havoc on the world, and then is captured by some secret government organisation, which we then focus on for a good long while so we can learn about how important it is, we learn that Tom Cruise’s character, Nick Morton is cursed with something, the mummy escapes and begin wreaking havoc on the world, and then is defeated by the main character.  I understand it needs to establish the universe it’s in, but the story seems to convoluted and struggles to focus entirely on the character the film is named after.

I know I probably shouldn’t be comparing the two films. They are after all, completely different. It’s hard to officially declare this one as a reboot of the previous, but it holds the same name. In the eyes of Hollywood, this is a reboot, therefore needs to be compared. If The Mummy (1999) hadn’t come out, I would have classed this as a good mummy film, but unfortunately, it isn’t the case. The structure has too many levels and the story is too convoluted. If I had a choice between The Mummy (1999) and The Mummy (2017), I would choose the first.

This film is much better than The Mummy Returns in terms of CGI. I also want to say that The Mummy Returns backtracks on so much The Mummy sets up, there are so many contradictions, it almost feels forced. And of course, The Mummy: Toom of the Dragon Emperor cannot be classed as part of the series with how dreadful it is, but even that has better CGI than second. However, despite this film having better CGI, it essentially copies and pastes that of what The Mummy (1999) does, but having a gigantic sand storm chase the main characters, and a face show up in the middle. It's different in how the storm is raging through the city of London, but it's essentially the same effect. I wouldn't have minded that if the rest of the film was better than that of the previous installment.

Rant aside, The Mummy (2017) does have a few good points. Tom Cruise’s performance, alongside Annabella Wallis does build a strong chemistry. I enjoyed seeing them interact with each other. I would have liked if she wasn’t revealed as a member of the secret organisation though, because then it would have been just two ordinary civilians hunting for the same thing – their chemistry portrays such, but their character’s aren’t that, which creates some confusion on my behalf, I’m afraid to say.

If this film wasn’t part of the Dark Universe, cutting out all the secret organisation stuff, this would have rivalled and probably beaten that of The Mummy (1999), because we would have had more time to learn about the mummy, the characters, seen battles between the two, but instead we only see a small battle, the mummy captured, and then the climactic battle is over as soon as it begins and it seems the mummy herself was being put back into her sarcophagus as soon as she climbed out. Cut the secret organisation out, you’re left with a hollow film. I’m sorry, but I didn’t like it as much as The Mummy (1999).

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)

This time it really is the end of the article.

The Watch – Part 185:

I found myself lying face down on my living room floor. The moment that I woke, I felt uncomfortable. Moving my arms and legs, the room started to spin, and I started to feel queasy. My arms and legs were aching from weakness, my neck was stiff from not moving much and the aching in my back started to die down.

I groaned as I forced myself up. My stomach was doing backflips as my head continued to spin faster and faster as I gradually twisted my body so that I could push myself up with my hands and knees. I didn’t want to risk standing just yet, so I sat down on the sofa instead. From the way my back reacted to the soft cushions, wherever I was, I must have been lying on some hard surface, probably something wooden.

Now that I’m sitting I can have a good look around. This may be my living room, but am I in my living room. I turn my head to look outside and immediately regretted it. The sunlight hit my eyes and I nearly threw up. I had to breathe in deeply and slowly to keep myself from having to run to the bathroom. From what I saw during that minute glance, a person was walking past the window, and a car was driving past. Everything looked normal. Eventually, my body settled down a bit and I was able to move without any side effects, but I still didn’t want to risk standing up. That will have to wait until I’m sure my head and stomach can handle it.

‘What happened?’ I asked no one in particular. It was at that moment that I remembered that Amy and Tom were still there, wherever I was. They are still being held in those glass containers.

‘I need to save them,’ I said standing up. Bad idea. My stomach wasn’t ready. The room started to spin. I was losing my balance. I fell to my knees and didn’t make it in time to the bathroom.

After that incident, my body seemed to be a lot better. My head wasn’t spinning as much and my stomach had stopped dancing. I was able to stand up and keep myself up. I looked down at the patch of mess that I made and nearly gagged. I had better clean that up.

Walking was something I had to get used to again. The achiness in my legs meant they were a lot weaker than usual. From the way they were bending and buckling under my own weight, they might not have had any use for a long while, and when I went to pick up a simple, empty bucket and a mop from the kitchen, my arms felt the same way and the mop went clattering to the floor, making a loud booming sound that echoed around the kitchen that forced my hands to my ears.

I’ve felt something along the lines of this after my first trip through the Void, but never at this magnitude. Recovering from dropping the mop, I picked it and the bucket up again and headed back into the living room where I very slowly and carefully mopped up the mess that I had created. Luckily it was all over the wooden floor and not the mat in front of the sofa, so it was a relatively short procedure. Once finished, I disposed of it all and put away the bucket and mop and headed back into the living room once more.

Sitting down on the sofa again, I sighed. All I can remember is just before I pressed the button to teleport me directly to where Amy and Tom were being kept. After that, there’s nothing. There’s only one person who can provide me with all the answers that I need, hopefully.

‘Interface,’ called. He appeared in front of me. He stood in his usual, upright position in his usual immaculate suit.

‘Hello, Sebastian,’ he said in his usual robotic sounding voice complete with an ordinary human-like voice, ‘how may I be of help to you today?’

‘What happened?’ I unintentionally demanded. ‘I mean, when I teleported, what happened? Can you explain to me as much as you can, if you can?’

‘Certainly,’ he said bowing his head. ‘Just before you did teleport directly to where Amy and Tom were, you were intercepted by a teleportation ray. As you were not using the watch to teleport, you were not protected and so you went in to a state of shock. It took you to an underground scientific research facility where you were then captured and injected with a substance that was designed to send you to sleep for a maximum of twenty-four hours. You were then strapped into a machine where you were injected with another substance that was designed to induce realistic dreams. The stronger the dose that you are subjected to, the deeper the sleep is and the more intense the dreams are as well. Due to you having the watch, they didn’t want to take any chances and so injected you with the strongest dose they could provide and you were sent into a strong coma-like state.

‘They then attempted to study the watch and find a way to take it off your wrist. They suggested amputating your hand off and sending you back to the surface, but, as strong as the substance is, it will not prevent you from waking up if your body goes through an intensive shock such as having a body part amputated.

‘Your body reacted to the substance almost immediately which is why you were questioning the inconsistency. Any other person would not have done so.’

‘So my body tried to fight it off. Is that because I have the watch or something else?’

‘Your body reacted to the substance because you were not from that world. You are from this one and therefore have different genetic makeup to theirs.’

‘But who was that person that was speaking to me? All those holograms. Was everything that happened within that ‘dream’ because of that substance?’

‘It was,’ he said simply. All of what happened. It feels as if it should have a much better explanation. I’m struggling to believe that everything that happened, including that person, was all down to that chemical that was being pumped into my system and I somehow just automatically rejected. And it’s that simple. Because I’m from a different world to them that I reacted to the substance. No other contributing factors?’

‘I can scan your body to give you a list of possible reasons,’ he said.

‘No, that won’t be necessary,’ I sighed. I was starting to regain my strength. ‘So, that substance is now out of my body completely. There are no long lasting side effects or anything that I should be worrying about.’

‘Your body has finished rejecting the substance. There are no side effects.’

‘Good.’

‘Is there anything else that I can help you with?’ he asked.

‘How come you didn’t help me?’ I asked. ‘How come you didn’t warn me that I was being captured and injected with these foreign chemicals?’

‘I am not programmed to help you unless instructed,’ he said.

‘I could have died,’ I snapped.

‘There was no valid possibility of that happening,’ he said.

‘That’s just another way of saying, ‘but you didn’t’. You said that you are here to help me, yet you stand back and let that happen to me, without a care in the world.’

‘I am not programmed to help you unless instructed.’

‘So you said,’ I was starting to get angry. But what reason do I have to get angry. In a way, he’s right. He isn’t programmed to help me unless instructed. It’s extremely lucky that my body does have a different genetic makeup to the people in that world. It would have been a different story if I had the same, and I don’t want to start thinking about that.

‘Sorry,’ I said.

‘You do not have to apologise. You did nothing wrong.’

‘I know. And neither did you.’ I sighed and rubbed my eyes with my fingers.

‘I need some fresh air.’

TO BE CONTINUED…

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)