The Written Podcast: New York (Part 13) – “Is That Alcohol?”

Today was the day I say goodbye to New York City. Alas, I won’t be returning for quite some time. New York was amazing. The thrill of feeling you’re in another country, the adrenaline rush from being overwhelmed, the enthusiasm generated from the things that people who live there just take for granted. Seeing the sights, eating the food, being scared by a taxi driver; all a part of an experience I’ll never forget.

I’ve walked around cities on my own, most common one is London. It’s crowded, it’s congested with traffic, and there’s plenty of shops. The first time I navigated around London by myself, I was nervous. Figuring out how to circumnavigate the underground network by myself was certainly the toughest part about London. Experienced visitors or workers could go from one end to the other with their eyes closed, but for someone like me, it takes a couple of minutes to work out that the station in front of me is indeed the one I need, but the train pulling into it won’t stop where I need to go, due to it pulling a right when inside the tunnels. But generally, walking around London is easy. If you keep yourself to yourself, no one even notices you’re there.

It’s exactly the same in New York. Keep yourself to yourself, no one will bother you… I’m adding three dots in the middle of this sentence to signify the first half works only 99% of the time. I was keeping myself to myself, but I was disturbed, by a Police Officer of all people. Before I explain what happened, basically nothing happened. He misunderstood what I had in my hand… I’ve just made things even more vague, haven’t I?

This story starts when I discovered a sweet shop that sat next door to Bloomindales. With it pelting down with rain, my head was down most of the time, so I didn’t notice it was there. Before heading outside, I decided to have a look on Google Maps to see what I could do since I had completed my list of things, I wanted to do this holiday – the majority of which I did on Tuesday. Unfortunately, I cannot remember the name of the sweet shop, but it sparked my interest. A sweet shop in America, that’s something I absolutely must investigate, so that’s what I did.

It wasn’t raining today, allowing my navigating skills to rebuild itself back to full strength, and I went straight to Bloomindales without hassle, subsequently to the sweet shop on the corner, and it looked packed, and for good reason; it was humongous, which meant they had every sweet known to mankind. I’m 25 years old, but I was like a kid in a candy store. I was grinning from ear to ear, looking at every product they had, not having a clue what to pick up first. An assistant did offer me a basket at first, but I declined, thinking I wasn’t going to purchase that much, but I was completely and utterly wrong. It did not take me long before my hands were full and the same assistant came over and offered me a basket again, this time with a chuckle of acknowledgement to her being right the first time, to which I accepted and placed all my items inside. Now I have a basket to load up, that’s what I did.

Jelly Beans are famous for coming in every flavour under the sun. From the nice to the disgusting, they make the lot, and this sweet shop stocked the lot as well. I stayed clear of the disgusting flavours, such as dirt and skunks spray, among many others, and favoured the pleasant ones, such as blueberry muffin, chocolate brownies, citrus fruits such as oranges and lemons and limes, and a can of beer flavoured Jelly Beans which I brought for my dad. Skipping to the end, I spent $66. That may be a lot, but this was my last day in New York and I had more money left over than I thought I would, so I dedicated my last day to a spending spree.

I also made sure to pay one last visit to Times Square. End my holiday where it started, essentially. Among my items were the Harry Potter collection, including but not limited to the Butterbeer the characters drink when visiting Hogsmeade. This of course was the non-alcoholic version, implying there is an alcoholic version out there somewhere, but thankfully no in this shop, and since I have never tried it before, I figured that today will be the day.

After purchasing my load of stuff – mainly Jelly Beans – I headed back to Times Square where I found a place to sit down and take in the majesty of the place one last time, whilst cracking open the bottle of butterbeer in the process. I do recommend that drink. It’s basically a butterscotch drink, which I should have guessed to be honest considering I am a fan of the books. I liked the drink to the point I was struggling to savour it. I wanted to drink that whole bottle in one session, but I made sure to take gaps between sips. Butterbeer looks like beer. The clues in the name. It’s illegal to drink alcohol on the street in America. If you’re caught you can get heavily fined. A Police officer spotted me drinking my butterbeer and understandably misunderstood it to be actual beer and so came over to question me about it.

“Excuse me, Sir,” the Police Officer said, “is that alcohol?” He was quite firm because from his perspective I could be someone who likes a morning drink on the street corner. I almost slammed the bottle in his face to prove that it wasn’t, and upon taking one look at it, relaxed and stated that everything’s OK, and simply walked away as if nothing happened. It was the oddest experience I’ve ever had. Of all the people I’ve interacted with over this holiday – and there haven’t been that many, just retail assistance and taxi drivers, a Police Officer was no one I was either expecting or hoping to speak to. That moment alone, I would never forget, let alone the entire holiday itself.

When he realised what it was I was drinking, he let me be, but, in a nutshell, that Police Officer was preparing himself to fine me, and search me for further alcohol on my person.

He suddenly appeared out of nowhere, so of course it was hair raising. I immediately felt the potential gravity of the situation as I took another sip of Butter Beer. That filled my quota for Times Square. I wasn’t going to top that experience and so I left soon after that and readied myself to leave New York City.

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)