The Watch – Part 208:

(Tom’s perspective)

It has only now hit me that I got away with it. I’m looking around, seeing all the people pass me on foot and in their vehicles, not knowing what I just did. I’m still hidden.

Do I feel bad for what I did? That’s a tough one to answer. My brain is happy that I gave it some more energy, but I did just steal something for the very first time. I feel, relieved more than anything that I got away with it, but that doesn’t stop me from feeling guilty for actually doing it. I had to do what I had to do, and if I stay here any longer, then I might have to do it again.

But seriously, though, do I feel guilty? Not as much as I should do. Does that make me a bad person? Have I changed as a person? I’m still me. I’m just adapting to the situation, and that situation is having no money. That doesn’t make me a bad person. Besides, I shouldn’t be here to debate that question, anyway. I should be at home, not worrying about these things.

I’m no longer hungry, but I am still thirsty. I was concentrating on getting some food that as soon as I picked up the bars, I wanted to get out of there as soon as I could, completely forgetting that I needed a drink.

How many more times can I take stuff and get away with it. I don’t want to become over-confident and therefore reckless so that I start thinking that I can get away with anything and therefore fall into the Police’s hands by committing a really terrible mistake. That would mean that I would be a bad person if I became desensitised to stealing stuff. I have to keep the thought that I am doing this purely to wait for when Sebastian comes to get me.

I should feel at least a bit guiltier than I am, though, surely.

I need a drink. My throat is stinging and the six chocolate bars didn’t help at all. If it weren’t for my hunger pains forcing the bars down, I wouldn’t have been able to swallow them properly due to how rough my throat is.

I shouldn’t go back to the shop I got the bars from, as that would be pushing my luck. I need to find another shop, preferably somewhere far away from here so that I can continue blending into the background.

I don’t want to fall into that trap where because I’ve done it once, I will be able to do it again as simple as before, because I know that it will be just as difficult. I might have gotten lucky the first time round. Who’s to say the next person in the other shop won’t have their backs turned towards me, instead their staring at me and watching my every move. I got lucky last time, didn’t I?

Well, I’m not going to stop and think about for far longer than I need to. I have to make a quick decision.

I’m saying to just go and do it. I have to do what I have to do, and that’s that. From now on, I’m not going to worry about why I’m not feeling as guilty as I actually am, or whether or not I will become a bad person as a result of it, I am in a parallel universe. No one knows me. And soon, I will be leaving this place, never to return. When I do return home, I can resume being the person I know I am. I know this is all happening out of the blue, but I refuse to keep repeating the same thoughts over and over again in my head and not getting anywhere. I will do what is necessary to survive.

I may not have the watch, but that’s not going to stop me. I know what I am capable of and I will use those capabilities to my advantage. Nothing’s going to stand in my way. Ok, I think I got a bit carried away with that last part, but my point still stands.

Now, where’s a shop so I can get myself a drink?

Walking the streets of the city once more, I eventually came across another shop. It was a lot bigger than the one I was in previously, but it was a corner shop nonetheless. Stepping inside, the stock was very well-organised. I was able to tell that everything had its rightful place the instant I walked into the shop. I looked to my right and saw the cereal section and to my left and saw the sandwiches and drink section. There were plenty to choose from. So many different kinds of sandwiches, including the classic egg mayonnaise, prawn mayonnaise and chicken mayonnaise, but then you had the less recognisable fillings such as cheese and sprouts, turkey and cheese and onion crisps. To be honest, that last one sounds like a pretty good idea considering so many people do add crisps to their sandwiches.

The drinks were plentiful as well. There was the standard apple juice, orange juice, but then there is the tomato juice, which I have tried once before and I would say that I would like to keep my tomato juice on my chips instead of in a bottle.

Anyway, I’m getting a bit distracted here. I need to pick something and get out of here. Apple juice will do. I picked it up from the shelf, turned on the balls of my heels, headed back towards the door, stepped outside, opened the bottle after making sure that it was shaken well, and walked off. When you have a throat that is as thirsty as mine, apple juice has never tasted better.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Thanks for reading

Antony Hudson

(TonyHadNouns)